try to hear my voice.;;closed

[Amina Krane]

The confusion on Tobias’ face seemed so out of place. Since Amina had come to be friends with him, there hadn’t been too much that she found Tobias misunderstanding, mostly because he had an intellect that was rivaled only by her very own Victoria. Of course, Victoria was just insanely smart. No one matched her, but Tobias was a close second. The funny thing that they both seemed to have in common, though, was that neither fit well into social situations. There was always something that they would miss, something they didn’t quite get that everyone else did, that made them stand out. Now was Tobias’ moment. Of course Amina understood the term ‘bird’ in all of its meanings. She could recall meanings to plenty of slang type words. But Tobias was another story. Looking over at Marcus, she could see that he was getting just as much, if not more, amusement from their confused friend as she was. Chuckling softly, Amina laced her fingers together and placed them on one hip as she looked between the boys, waiting for Marcus to explain what he was referring to. But the explanation never came. Her grin widened as she realized Marcus was going to leave Tobias in his confused stupor. Another tactic to help win the game, possibly? Whatever the end game, she wouldn’t stand in his way so instead, Amina remained where she stood and just enjoyed the scene that was playing out in front of her. For the first time in a while, a long while, she was feeling happy. The thought of the letter that had brought down her entire morning had become a blip in the back of her mind. No doubt she would think of it later, once she wasn’t so occupied, but for now, she had the opportunity to just be herself.

“Tobias, I believe you are next? No need ta get fancy. We shoulda started ye back a good bit more considerin’ yer talents.” Amina’s eyes rolled from Tobias to Marcus as she put on the most innocent face she could muster amongst all of this fun, and shrugged her shoulders. “I’m not entirely sure what you’re talking about. What talents?” she mused, unable to hold back a small chuckle. She knew she had gotten a little showy on them, but it was in her nature to perform to the best of her abilities. Though she wasn’t much a fan of showboating. They didn’t tend to go hand in hand, but form was everything. Form trumped letting others win. But she wasn’t planning on winning. Even though it would be easy to surpass these two and get to the end point, this was their game and they had just kindly allowed her to step in. What kind of person would she be to just take over and win their game? Keeping her hands on her hip, Amina looked between the boys as she awaited them to make their moves. She had suspected Tobias just to use another piece of the clothing on his person as the next stepping stone, however, he did something a little more unexpected. He actually took the bag right off of Marcus’ back. Slipped it right off. As it dangled in his hand, Amina could hardly believe what she had seen. Was Tobias playing… dirty? Or was this part of their game? Did they not have rules against that sort of thing? “Aye!!” With widened eyes, Amina’s hands dropped from her hip. She watched as Tobias tossed the bag to a point within jumping distance. Apparently it wasn’t part of the game because she could see how Marcus wasn’t too pleased about the sudden loss of one of the few remaining items on his person. Unable to help herself, Amina started laughing. “Sleeven.” Tobias made his jump, not too difficult, and the result was him being further ahead than her and Marcus.

Somehow, she couldn’t bring herself to stop grinning. Never had she considered Tobias the cheating type, the person to bend the rules for his own gain. But this gave her a new insight to him. She liked seeing more of him, seeing how he interacted with Marcus. Amina wasn’t entirely sure why, but he seemed different than when it was just the two of them. More open, maybe? More playful? She wished she could see this side of him more often. Her grin relaxed to a smile, for what reason, she wasn’t sure, but she couldn’t quite take her eyes off of him. Not until Marcus began moving out of the corner of her eye. Switching focus, she took her eyes off of Tobias and to Marcus who was now pulling off his shoe. Apparently he was going to use the same move Tobias had earlier. Once he tossed the shoe and made the jump, though short as it may be, Amina knew it was her turn again. She could pull another fancy maneuver out of her pocket and show them up some more. She had plenty of them so it wouldn’t be hard. But somehow she just couldn’t bring herself to do that to them. “We’re ta that now yeh? Ye should watch yerself birdie, ‘pparently we’re pullin all ta stops out now.” Chuckling softly, Amina moved her hands from her hip and held up one finger, waiving it back and forth at him. “You sure it’s him you should be worrying about?” she joked, her hand moving into her bag as it dug around for another book. Her fingers rubbed a spine of one of them and she pulled it out, casually tossing it ahead of her. The space wasn’t too far, just a simple jump and she would be where she needed to be. Rubbing her palms together, Amina made a show that her jump was going to be something spectacular, and maybe at the last second she would have decided she couldn’t hold it back and needed to show off, but she didn’t get that far. Instead, the wind picked up for just a moment, bringing with it a scent that she easily picked up with her heightened senses, and suddenly everything was off.

The jump she was about to spring into turned into more of a stagger and before she knew it, her bare toes grazed the grass and she stumbled to her knees. A look of shock was on her face, but it wasn’t from the fact that she had fallen. It was because that scent. She knew it. It brought memories flooding back just by the smallest of whiffs, both from the summer, throughout the entire school year, and especially that morning when she had received the letter. She had been doing so well to enjoy herself and not think about it and it just takes one scent to bring her back? Merlin, how pathetic was she? Especially because it was just the wind. It had to be. Why would he be out walking around here at this time? He had his fiancé to be with at dinner. Shaking her head, she turned to look at the boys and chuckled. “Whoops. Looks like you guys are getting off easy. I’m already out,” she said, flashing a half smile. “Though now I just get to watch and see who wins. And decide who I choose to help with all of the spare books I now have,” she added, patting the side of her bag with her hand. She only hoped that she was right, that it had been the wind. She didn’t need to see Gavin right now. She didn’t need another reminder of everything she had lost.

Words | 1,291
Tag | Tobias, Marcus, Gavin, Kariana
Outfit | Click

[Gavin Dewhurst]

i'll bare my skin,
(AND I'LL COUNT MY SINS)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Honestly, if he was given the choice tomorrow to right his life. If he was given all of the broken pieces and told to put the picture back together however he would have liked, he didn't know what he would do. If Amina was back in his arms tomorrow, what would he do? Would it just make everything better? He knew it would feel better, but would it fix his life? The hole that he had dug himself into wasn't her fault. Her presence wouldn't fill the dirt back on, no matter how much he wanted her too. He wanted it to make everything that much better, but she wouldn't be some cure all for everything that ails him. He had to fix himself, but without her, he didn't even feel the need to try. He knew that all of his other relationships were falling by the wayside. As the woman who felt like she was about to tremble beside him did. He liked being the strong man that she knew, the light hearted womanizer that he had been for so much of his life. It was comfortable, easy, he enjoyed it. Yet – he couldn't do it. He couldn't be her Gavin. He couldn't even remember how. He had expected her to leave already, not that she had ever given any indication that she would ever leave him – his mind interrupted himself. She had though, hadn't she? She had left him. They were supposed to be family. Family didn't leave. She was supposed to be his other half, the only one in his world who really knew him, and had just left him. Family didn't leave. She was just proof that would cement the things that he didn't even want to think. He couldn't do that to the family that stayed. He couldn't desert his mother, his father and brother. He had to do what they wanted, they needed him to forge this bond with Lucinda's family. He knew now, how desolate it felt whenever family left. To feel so very hollow, and at the same time as his own self induced heartache...it had been almost more than he could bear.

He wanted to be able to break. To allow the craze that had been building up within him every day since summer to just come out, to just sit with Kariana in silence, to have her be the strong one for the first time in a long time. He had only ever let her do it once before. Back in fifth year, had been the only time he had really, honestly let somebody in before Amina. He had broken then, and she had been the one to turn him away, to fix it. He wished she could be that now, even though he knew she couldn’t be. Not any longer. That one time had changed things, even if neither of them would ever voice it aloud. He couldn't allow it. He couldn't break, not even for a moment. He might collapse and never stand again. He could feel the anger at her, the anger he clung to, he couldn't forgive her. She deserved it, he understood why she had gone, but he couldn't let it go. It seemed he couldn't let anything go these days. He knew that his bitterness was causing Kariana pain. He just couldn't bring himself to stop, if anybody could share his hurt, it was her. He had always been able to lash out at her, their relationship had previously just been solid like that. If he was the one to break it now, so be it.

The cool air that came with the slowly setting sun hit him harder than it used to. He had always been a very large man, and given the growth spurt that he had encountered over the last year, the wind had always moved around him with ease, but due to his shrinking frame, the wind bit more harshly over his skin. There was no layer of fat over his muscles any longer, nothing to keep the bite at bay. Wishing that he had a jacket, not for the first time since he had lost weight, his spare hand tightened around the strap of his bag. He felt her head turning, kept her lips press into his sleeve, but even her body heat didn't warm him enough. He understood what she meant, he should have absorbed some sort of comfort from her reassurance, but he didn't. He would have, but not this year. He felt her arm move around his waist after a few steps. It didn't rest hardly reaching his hip like it used to, it was almost touching his navel. Merlin. Her tiny arms didn't used to be able to reach around him fully whenever they hugged. Due to her tiny frame and his large bulk, his eyes dropped down to her hand, her hand clamping the fabric of his shirt to his body. No longer allowing it to dangle from his shoulders giving the illusion of size. His eyes widened in spite of themselves. He knew that he had to use a belt, he knew that he had stream lined his frame, but he didn't know it had been that much. Another few steps and he couldn't take it, he didn't want to be forced to realize the problems with himself. Removing his arm from her shoulders he sidestepped a pace, putting distance between the two of them, hoping that she wouldn't call him out on it.

Yet, the worry was short lived. He heard something, a simple sound that almost made him sink to his knees. On top of everything, he was hearing things. Gavin's neck craned to the side, and then his body followed. He could feel Kariana coming up behind him, following wherever he lead. Most of the grounds were clear now, as far as the eye could see, He could hear something around the hill, out by the tree line. His feet moved even though his heart didn't think that it could handle whatever it might see. It might just rupture out of his chest if she was there, and stop if she wasn't. He heard her laugh. He could never forget the sound like rippling water and icicles breaking. Deeper than a bell but just as round. His heart rate was elevating, and his breath was coming in jagged breaths. Merlin what had he become, he could feel Kariana's hand back within his at his sudden veer off course. He didn't fight her, he grasped back tightly, a small panic as he hurried around the corner. Nothing could have prepared him for what he found. She was there, his heart leapt, he wasn't imagining things. Only, she wasn't alone. As happy as it was to steal a glance at her, it pained him to see her so happy. Who was she with? She didn't have any male friends that he knew of – Merlin what if they weren't friends? His lungs stopped functioning, Kariana pulled him to the side, up the hill that Amina and her friends were at the bottom of. It was a slowly sloping thing, he couldn't not see her. She looked far too distracted to have noticed the likes of him. He couldn't stop staring. What in Merlin's beard where they doing?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
just close my eyes,
(TILL I CAN TAKE IT IN)

words: 1,227
outfit: This
tags: Kariana, Amina, Marcus, Tobias.
notes:none for now I think
credit: gabs of a different color; @ caution 2.0

[Tobias Leberecht]

SOMETIMES I FIND IT HARD
• to believe there's someone else who could be •
JUST AS MESSED UP AS ME

There was a knot forming in his foot. Right under the arch. It was more than a little uncomfortable, every time that he wiggled his toes...he could feel it. He knew that it was because of the things he was standing on. They were wobbly and uneven. They were going to make him forfeit if he couldn't move soon. They needed to take their turns. For the sake of his feet. Of course, if he said anything about it, then Marcus would drag out his turn on purpose, just to make him suffer for taking the bag off of his back. He really didn't need to make Marcus upset right about now, as he was just about the only reason Tobias wasn't fumbling over his words. The flutter in his gut hadn't dissipated, whatever was causing that, but the familiar motions of their friendship was easy enough to take comfort in. “Sleeven,” grinning and nodding with a grimace at the pain that shot through his foot from the movement in his body the small action had caused. Testing the contents in the bag as he attempted to shift his weight didn't yield any results. It seemed if he attempted to switch feet, he was going to slide off the contents and into the lava. He didn't feel like dying again whenever he had just been brought back to life. What a second life he was having as well, he was just barely in front...though if Amina did another flippy thing...he wasn't going to be for long. At least he was confidant that Marcus couldn't pull out anything surprising, unless he was hiding something under the shirt he was wearing. Which, while possible, was very unlikely.

Sure enough, the boy pulled off a shoe. “Original.” he put bluntly with just a hint of mirth as his friend swung the thing and hopped over to it. There was no way that any of them were going to be making it to the tree line. “We’re ta that now yeh?” He had nothing but a cheeky smile in response. “Ye should watch yerself birdie, ‘pparently we’re pullin all ta stops out now.” There it was again. Birdie. At least this time there was some sort of context...obviously he meant Amina...which meant...that it was some sort of...slang...again. Bringing his hand up he hit his palm against his forehead, slowly raking it down his face. “Oooh...” he breathed. Merlin that had taken longer than it should have. His stomach did another flip at random. At least, it felt like it was random...even if there was this lingering feeling behind it, making him feel anxious and ashamed for not keeping his mouth shut. Was he, embarrassed? Bringing his hand to press up against his stomach for just a moment his brow pinched. What in Merlin's name was wrong with him? Quickly, he dropped his hand before he could feel anybody's eyes on him. Why did he feel so strange? This was all new to him.

You sure it’s him you should be worrying about?” A smile crossed his face easily at the sight of her own. The strange emotions he had just been suffering seemed to leave him as quickly as they had come. She was taking to their game rather easily after all. She was a natural. He contemplated telling her so...but it felt strange to even consider. As she fished out another book and plopped it onto the ground, his gaze locked onto her figure, awaiting another one of her fancy flips or cartwheels. His smile melting from one of humor and fun to a softer one of admiration. Only, the jump never came. She staggered, like the light wind was going to whisk her away, even if it was an impossible notion. What happened? She had been fine a second ago. Confused, he shot a glance to Marcus to see if the other boy had noticed something that Tobias hadn't. “Whoops. Looks like you guys are getting off easy. I’m already out,” Shrugging, he tore his eyes from Marcus and rolled them back to where Amina was on her knees. “Though now I just get to watch and see who wins. And decide who I choose to help with all of the spare books I now have,” Slowly, he shook his head. “leave no man – fe-man, behind.” Slouching he tucked himself into a tumble, sacrificing himself to the Lava. Sprawling himself out onto the grass just a little more than an arm's length away from Amina he extended an arm, as if he was reaching down into a cavern to hoist her up from a branch that she was dangling from. Snapping his other hand to have Marcus take hold of his ankle to hoist the both of them back up. His imagination might take him on a strange route, but he had little to no shame. “This is a rescue mission!” he exclaimed with gusto. Pretending to struggle to reach her he wiggled his fingers. “We will save you!” with a cheesy grin he chuckled for a second before placing an overly serious expression on her face, waiting to see if she would play along.

TAGGED ! amina, marcus, kariana, gavin
WORDS ! 864
OUTFIT ! CLICK
LYRICS ! sometimes by skillet
TEMPLATE ! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ! -hello

[Kariana Gabrielle Travers]

If she were to say that by putting his arm around her he’d made her feel any more confident in him returning to his former self then she’d be lying. A lie she wasn’t sure even she could pull off. His arm about her shoulders only seemed to heighten the differences; the way her arm tucked around him much further than should have been possible, the way he didn’t lean into the gesture as he once might have, even the way he felt against her didn’t instill her with any feeling of rightness. Because he was forcing it. For her. How often had he done things for her, been there for her? How often over the years had she been able to continue on as though her day hadn’t changed just from the thought of knowing that he was there to lean on should she need it? She didn’t like to think that she’d taken it for granted, after all theirs had always been a give and take relationship, it was one reason it worked so well. But she’d never even begun to fathom how it would be if Gavin weren’t himself, if he weren’t firing on all cylinders and pushing her to do the same. They had always pushed eachother, always competed however good naturedly (or not) to be the best at everything they did. Only he wasn’t any more. It was like with that girl out of his life she’d taken the very fight that drove him with her. Oh, he was still there, moving- going about business in all the ways he thought he ought. He still attended classes and practice. Still excelled at every game. If anything he was pushing himself harder in some areas, as if to make up for the slack that had fallen into others. It wasn’t Gavin behind his eyes though, instead it was a shell whatever broken pieces she’d left behind resided in. And it was as if she finally saw what the outcome of not having the other there to lean on, however insubstantially, became. Even if she was the root cause of all of this mayhem, even if she by her actions and lack thereof had borne the brunt of this blow down upon the man beside her… Kat had played her part as well. She hadn’t been there to challenge the decisions he’d made since everything had fallen out from under him, hadn’t been there to provide the unspoken support she had for as long as either party could remember, and to make it worse she’d left without warning right before the final decisions had fallen into place. Four letters shouldn’t be so heavy upon her shoulders. Yet if guilt had been tattooed into the skin therein it would never adequately describe the pain that came with it. The husk going through the motions beside her lay at her feet. She’d entrusted him to her. Allowed her to permeate the very fabric of their lives and never once voiced complaint or tried to bring about an end to the affair as it blossomed. She’d had her doubts, and she’d kept them to herself. Look where it had gotten them. She had everything within her grasp, had been given so much more than most women could ever hope to dream of… and she’d let it all go without a fight. The nails of her free hand dug further into the skin of her palm, crescent shaped bruising already giving way to the bite it accompanied. And she had assisted her, the girl who left destruction in her wake without a backwards glance. Kariana may not have been there to witness it, but the after effects of the entire thing were telling enough as it were. And while some part of her understood that she hadn’t been able to leave word when she’d left, that she’d been given no time herself… but she also knew that if she were given the decision of leaving again- summons or no… her cousin that she barely tolerated or Gavin… she would have stayed. Consequences be damned.

Because, these consequences? Weren’t in any way justifiable of any life.

Her anger mounted once more at the face that seemed to dance in the silence between them, now tawny eyes daring her to say more. That girl had been … accepted, welcomed even. She had been given honors that no one else ever had, and now never would. She had taken the fabric of their group and torn it asunder without a backwards glance. She hadn’t fought for Gavin, hadn’t approached him and told him that they could work through all of these things. She hadn’t come back after him to show him exactly what it was that he really wanted as he’d needed her to. She hadn’t even attempted. And she had been awarded so fucking much. Too much to throw away like she had, too much to expect her earlier feelings to be considered anything more than a fanciful flight. Like Romeo she proved to be just as fickle a lover when time came to prove herself otherwise. But Kat would be damned if Gavin played the Rosiland of this play, much less the Juliet. Even if the rumors of Amina’s withdrawal were true, even if she seemed to have lost whatever sparkle may have been evident in her before it could be nothing compared to the living monument to depression next to her. And that pissed her off. It infuriated her to her very core. How she could carry on as if nothing had really changed, when there had been so much lost… so much abandoned by her refusal to do anything but roll over and continue on as if she wasn’t leaving behind the best thing she could ever possibly hope to achieve in her life… Skin finally gave way to nail, pushing steadily into the moon shaped crevices that had created the flow in the first place and pooling against her skin. It felt good, it felt right that some bit of her frustration took physical manifestation. She may not be able to fix Gavin with her words, or even her actions. Fixing him may remain completely beyond him, but she could stay with him… as she should have done in the first place, her mind couldn’t seem to help tacking on the guilt ridden sentence, forcing it into her conscience and leaving it there to fester and grow. The roots had been lain weeks ago, pushing their way steadily upwards through every level of psyche she tried to throw down to impede their inevitable rise. She was past that, over it. If she couldn’t embrace the guilt she couldn’t hope to begin to fix the structure that still lay in ruins at her feet. In ruins but not completely razed. Even if his arm around her wasn’t in the form of what it had once been it was still an improvement from her first weeks back, still a show that he didn’t want to be like this. He just didn’t know how not to be. And she could get that. She could grasp that concept if she had to. It gave her something to work with, which was more than she’d had recently. She needed more time with him. Her mind was resolute on the fact. Not because she thought being around her would help him any, but it would help her understand, help her find a way around this thing that seemed to have taken hold of him. Reading him wasn’t the same as it had always been, didn’t come as easily. But the language was still there, hidden beneath a new layer of him that she hadn’t yet had access to. And if she was good at anything it was a challenge that Gavin presented her, unwittingly or not. Only this challenge held more on the line than even their most daring had before. She wasn’t fighting for a prize or recognition anymore; she wasn’t even fighting just to fight. She was fighting for keeps. For the right for Gavin to keep himself. And after all of this was done and over with, she’d never talk of it again. She’d bury it just as deeply as anything else that didn’t deserve to see the light of day again. He wouldn’t need the reminder… and she wasn’t sure she could face it a second time.

She felt the absence before she saw him creating it, her eyes slanting towards him as she broke herself out of her thoughts silently. Silent. Everything about them these days seemed to be communicated best in the silence. It hadn’t been for long- the physical contact short lived, but she found herself counting it as a step in the right direction. A small step, but it was there, even if it didn’t seem as such right now… At least it was obvious that it hadn’t been something she had done, or even not done, as she’d learned was often the problem these days. No, he was off in his own head again, and she could accept that. She was starting to believe she could accept anything along the road she had begun to traverse. As much positivity as she tried to enthuse into her thoughts though, and however bad an attempt it may have been, it was as short lived as the weight of his arm around her shoulders. The tension within him seemed to reach insurmountable levels, his neck snapping in a direction before the rest of his body seemed to catch up to it, leading him on a path different from the one they’d been ambling down. Not that she was against the change in direction. Not just that, no. She would follow him wherever he wanted to walk today, listen to whatever he did or didn’t want to say, that wasn’t the problem. There had been a sound, brief on the wind, too brief for her already deep within her mind to pick out what it was. But Gavin had recognized it. Had recognized and was now heading towards without any thought process at all. Which boded ill in her mind, an omen that couldn’t be ignored. Wasn’t there some proverb or old wives tale about following voices on the wind? Nothing good could come of it, of that much she was sure. But she followed none the less, lengthening her stride to catch up to the few feet he’d made without her. She didn’t second guess herself as she slid her hand back down his arm, twining her fingers with his instantly. She didn’t know what he’d heard, didn’t know what they were heading into, but she knew that he’d need her- and she wasn’t going anywhere this time. So when he squeezed her hand more tightly within his own she added her own pressure with her fingers, hoping to convey that very message to him. She was here. She was staying. She chose him this time. No matter what. Come hell or high water. And any other inane phrases that fit. She’d voice them if need be, yell them into his ears until he understood that he came first. Only she never got the chance to do more than grasp his hand before they were around the corner and looking on a scene so macabre that Shakespeare himself in all of his incest and needless death couldn’t have written better. Her eyes scanned quickly over the discarded objects littering the grassy floor, ran hurriedly over the odd positioning of the figures standing below… before finally cataloguing just who they were walking up upon. Amina was the easiest to note, the fire that seemed to feed her soul igniting at the very sight of the girl. The other two were just as recognizable for totally different reasons though. Both of them of year with her. Both of them to be scorned in their own right. The Gryffindor was probably the oddest boy she’d ever so much as seen, he never made any sense and while she couldn’t claim to know him individually she’d been present when he’d conducted some odd bout of behavior and been subsequently cut down for it. It was the other boy that drew her eyes more though. It figured…

Like attracted like after all. How fitting for her to find the traitorous bitch cavorting with what had to be the biggest blood traitor of their year. She’d said more than her fair share of snide words to the tall youth running balancing oddly on a shoe as he grasped the other boys’ ankle. She’d even gone out of her way a time or two to place a hex on him when the opportunity arose. After all, he’d betrayed more than just the purity of the blood running through his veins. He was a legacy, a born and bred Slytherin- and as such expected to carry on tradition. More than expected. Needed. Which might have been well and fine, even sorted into Ravenclaw as he had been. Kariana herself couldn’t find much wrong with that house, it wasn’t Slytherin by any means- but she had no problems associating with those that came from that particular hall. No, he might’ve redeemed himself if not for his own odd behavior, refusal to partake in anything even resembling the responsibilities he was due. Her fingers crushed more tightly upon the ones in her hand, unable to stop herself from dragging him with her up the hill. She knew he needed to move, she just didn’t know in what particular direction yet. At least once they reached the top he could make the decision to confront the group below or walk away. It was in his hands, it would have to be. All she had to do was accept whatever he chose and go along with it. It was, in its own right, a challenge. Isn’t that how they functioned best in the first place? Her feet halted as she looked down at the group, eyes cutting to her still shell-shocked companion. It was only when the blood traitor made his next move that she angled her body closer, twining her arm around his to assure him with physical closeness in ways that she knew her words would never reach him. It wasn’t even sure that touching him would, but it was all she had in her arsenal- and she was prepared to use anything and everything that lay at her disposal. “Gavin,” her voice came out low and quick- attempting to push its way through whatever haze had fallen over his eyes. “It may not be what it looks like, it probably isn’t. She isn’t like that.” Never mind that the bitch very well could be with all that she’d shown Kat knew about her. She’d never suspect her of walking away as she had either. But she called upon every ounce of reserve she had, every lie she’d ever uttered so believingly that it came out as sure as truth to make those words leave her lips. Because they were what Gavin needed to hear. It didn’t matter that she hated the bitch. It didn’t matter that she herself wanted to tear down the hill and rip her from his grasp. She didn’t belong there. She’d already given herself over, even if she’d apparently recanted, those arms should never have touched her. “We can go wherever you want,” she stressed the wherever as hard as she dared because she meant it. She’d go wherever he decided, back him up in whatever form he needed her to put herself into right now. She could bend, she could mold- because he was breaking. As audibly as if someone had taken the most horrendous of unforgiveables, he was breaking. And she couldn’t. She had to stand there to pick up the pieces after they fell, wherever he let them fall. “Wherever you want Gavin.”




WORDCOUNT:: 2,662
MUSICPLAYING:: Bottoms Up by Nickelback
CURRENTMOOD:: Anxious
POSTTAGGEDFOR:: Gavin, Amina, Marcus, Tobias
CHARACTEROUTFIT::
AUTHORSNOTES:: n/a

TEMPLATE CREATED BY YOUR SWEET DEMISE of CAUTION 2 THE WIND

[Marcus O'Conner]

living is easy with eyes closed

- - - - misunderstanding all you see - - - - 

If he’d been worrying about how drab his life had gotten there for the first few months of term it had certainly been made up recently. He’d managed to talk Victoria into skipping, while not a first, certainly the first time he’d managed the feat single-handedly and when she’d been completely set to making it to the class in the first place. He’d had his share of shock value when stumbling upon Amina’s scent on the way to Osiris’s for the first time; even more so when granted access to her brain that he doubted any outside of the other man running with him had ever been allowed. He’d even made a new friend. Because that is exactly what Birdie was, he’d as quick as made the decision as seen her struggling inside of the cabin- huddled upon herself in the chair. Even if he hadn’t recognized it right off the bat. He ticked the instances off on mental fingers, adding today to the list. Making special not of Tobias’s behavior today, and the way that Amina folded into them so easily. She’d had a rough go of it lately, doubly so with the drama that came with her change- he’d had courtside seats to that event on more than one occasion when sharing mental space with her. But she was laughing in the here and now, showing them up at their own game they’d just initiated her into. He wasn’t even going to pretend he wasn’t proud of the fact, he saw no reason to. She might even be able to decipher Victoria’s blushes where the boys failed to. Not that they tried overly hard to really get to the root of them, they were amusing enough without really knowing. And their guesses, as far off base as they usually were, sent her into peals of laughter. Victoria laughing could never be wrong in his book. As apparently now neither could Amina. His lips stretched into a grin at the sight, turning to Tobias with all further agitation with his cheap move from before gone, replaced instead with the tranquility that his brief insight had just afforded him. They were so close to being done with this place, from moving on. If someone had asked him second year he wouldn’t have seen himself here, back then graduating had looked too similar to the process of actually making it to the tree line with what little they had left: impossible. But they were already there, all three of them. Right within grasping distance of the closest tree limb, only a hop or two more to freedom. Freedom from studies, freedom from regulation… and for him freedom from beneath his family’s shadow. There would be no more going home on the summers and suffering the cold eyes mocking him from across the table as he ate. He’d still visit; he’d have to if he expected to keep any grace at all from those who had sired him. Grace he’d need with what he was, something else he’d be more free to embrace once free of these walls and towers. His grin stretched wider as he shrugged at Tobias’s own. Things could only get better.

“Original.” He didn’t react beyond his own amused lift of brows; his move wasn’t the most original of the lot sure. But it was a far cry from the steps Tobias has stooped to so early in the game… Something he chose to remind the other boy of with a pointed look to the bag he perched so precariously on. Good, he half hoped that he’d left his quills facing up towards the minimal padding of his feet. Childish maybe, but if Tobias fell it left only Amina… and while she had more things and an obvious advantage she’d earlier hidden he now had a better grasp of her playing style… and advanced knowledge of the game to put to use. He turned at the exhalation of air that left his friend, eyebrows quirked in worry before he caught back up to what he himself had just said… again. Of course. His grin returned full force, merriment dancing within the amber hued tones of his irises. “Catching up now Tobes?” He watched the play of emotions pass quickly on him, eyes following the progression of his hand with another secretive sort of smile. He hadn’t imagined things earlier then. Tobias was definitely taking an interest in their new lupine friend. Which was… excellent. He resisted the ridiculous urge to rub his palms together in anticipation, instead only sending his friend a knowing look before flipping his head around at the teasing lilt that had entered said object of affection’s voice. “You sure it’s him you should be worrying about?” Artfully he brought his hand over his breast, pressing the back of it to the steady thrum of his heart with a contrived hurt look on his face. “Worried ‘bout him birdie? An’ I ‘spose yer not countin meself in ta runnin at all now? I’m hurt.” The slight tilt of his lips gave his game away, but then he’d hardly been trying too hard in the first place. “An antyways, ye dun even know wha’tall we migh’n’tve pulled out ourselves yet.” An arch look as she dug through her bag, obviously searching for something she deemed appropriate. It was true both boys had their fair share of tricks they hadn’t employed just yet, though he’d done his best to make it sound like something even more than what was actually there. “Isn’ dat right Tobes?” He turned to his friend for back up, waggling his brows for emphasis. He nearly missed her jump entirely, too amused himself with watching the way that the other boys features shifted while watching her, though the minute she poised herself for takeoff he found his face rotating back in her direction, catching the breeze full into his face as he did so. It wasn’t with surprise then that he watched her drop to the ground, his nostrils flaring as he took in the two new scents approaching. He wasn’t overly familiar with either, not enough to recognize right off. One was citrusy with added spice faintly clinging in undertones, while the other was woodsy- entirely male… but off. The breeze barely lasted enough for him to catch all of it, but he could tell by the shift that whoever they were they were moving closer…

“Whoops. Looks like you guys are getting off easy. I’m already out.” And he knew only one person that could have her poise shatter so completely as he’d just watched. Oh she was trying to regain the atmosphere of it all, but the tension was still clinging to her spine like nettles to his other half’s fur. He met Tobias’s gaze briefly, feeling the boys eyes on him and shaking his head slightly. It was best to ignore it for now, it had to be. There was no reason for the duo who had been approaching to come around the corner of castle that blocked them from view. Not many people came out this way, it was one of the many reasons that the two boys frequented it for games such as these. The scents seemed to cling to his nosehair, evoking a slew of memories that weren’t his own. No, he didn’t want the scents that had drifted this way to come anywhere near the clearing. “Though now I just get to watch and see who wins. And decide who I choose to help with all these spare books I now have.” He wasn’t going to call her on it, wasn’t even sure how to. Instead he plastered his grin back on his face. He did share a better chance of winning if Tobias has already been reduced to st--- “Leave no man- fe-man, behind.” His concentration was shattered as the other boy sacrificed himself unto his death, chuckle leaving his lips at his pose. Leave it to Tobias to not even know the situation and still react in the way best suited. With an exaggerated roll of his eyes in Amina’s direction he stretched his arm out as far as it would allow, focusing his strength more firmly into his legs as he grasped the proffered ankle. “Thas righ’, don’t’ye know tha ta crew loses all tha luck when ta birdies lost?!” He didn’t have to feign the horror at the thought, though humor still pulsed through his tone. With a strength that he wouldn’t have had had it not been for the duplicity of his nature he pulled the boy back to him, laughing as Amina took the quick, hurried steps to keep up with the sliding body of the boy she’d placed her hand into. It wasn’t as if they’d been so terribly far from one another, setting Tobias back up on his feet was an easy enough matter, though he made sure to do so back onto the grass with a small grin of his own. “Aye look, ta birdie lives… and ye know what tha means?” He’d barely paused before bending down double to throw his arms around Amina’s hips, hoisting her up over his shoulder as he stood. “Tha means I win!”
He proceeded to half-jog, half-skip his way around Tobias, humming as loudly and as off key as possible as he did so. “Yer a good luck charm birdie, ye know that? We’re goin’ ta have ta keep ye now.” Not that that had ever been in question. After two or three more rounds a voice whispered past his ears, the hairs on the back of his neck rising defensively as he stopped both mid stride and mid tune, eyes cutting to the hill they sat beneath. Because of course things had been going far too well for it not to be spoiled. Slowly, though as not to startle the girl he’d unceremoniously heaped upon his shoulders he slid her back down again, his eyes refusing to stray from the couple standing on top of the hill. “Tobias.” All joviality was gone from his tone, the somber note entirely foreign to his vocal chords as he placed one large hand over the girls shoulder and pulled him halfway behind her before finally lowering his eyes. “Yer goin’ ta remember what I said about us an’ losin’ the birdie, righ’?” Though serious a smile did briefly touch his lips before he looked up once more, centering Amina between both he and Tobias.

tag Gavin, Kariana, Amina, Tobias
words 1,753
lyrics strawberry fields forever - the beatles
credit a girl with kaleidoscope eyes @ caution 2.0
wearing this

[Gavin Dewhurst]

i'll bare my skin,
(AND I'LL COUNT MY SINS)
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His eyes could see everything that was in front of him. The odd trail of clothing items and books, bits of parchment just large enough to hold a foot. He could see the two holding on to one another while reaching out for Amina. He could see it, see the smiles on their faces and yet his brain refused to acknowledge it. He couldn't comprehend what they were doing. A voice in the back of his head told him that this was what he had been wanting this entire time, that this was what he told her to do. To move on, to be happy. He had told her from the first day that they had been alone together that he would hurt her, that she should hate him. Forever. Yet, she never listened. He had just assumed that would have always been true. Perhaps it was foolish, to allow even the smallest part of him to think about her every single moment of every single day, whenever she so clearly wasn't feeling the same things, she wasn't thinking about him. In this moment, she was focused on another man, the man with his hand outstretched to her, she put her hand in his, and his own flexed. His free hand opened and closed, he could feel it, her small fingers intertwining with his own. Just for a moment, the wind moving between his splayed fingers felt like her hand, he could smell her hair just under his chin, her tiny frame pressing behind his own. Only, it wasn't her. She was over there. With somebody else. The fingers that were actually holding his own weren't her. They were somebody else. His brain didn't want to accept that either. As his grip went slack, the other hand tightened, clung, not allowing him to break the physical contact. She wasn't going to let him go. In that moment, they were on the same page, for the first time in months if felt like he wasn't alone. A sound not unlike a whimper hardly left his lips as his feet crossed one over the other and stumbled up behind Kariana, up the hill, away from Amina. His bag was forgotten, left behind on the ground at the base of the hill where he had faltered in the first place. Gut reactions, pulling him out of his head just enough. A panic was rising in his stomach. It didn't belong here, it wasn't right. He had no right to care, no right to panic, he had a fiance inside of the castle, one who he should be feeling these things for, but he couldn't. He hadn't even gotten a good look at who it was she was with, but they weren't him. That was all that mattered to him in this moment. His eyes kept darting back in the direction of the base of the hill, but he could no longer see them, not clearly from the long slope of the hill, he knew she was there. His heart rate was elevating. His eyes snapped open, every part of him felt cold. So cold. He could feel his chest moving, faster than it should have been. His voice didn't even want to leave the hearth of his throat, “Care...I...” the words were nothing more than a pant. He couldn't focus on her, on Amina, on any of it. He couldn't hold still.

He had been doing so well, so very very well. He had avoided her classes, they had somehow managed to find a way to take different paths down the hall, they were never put together for Prefect duty. He hadn't even seen her face in person in months. Not since her dorm. He had forced Kariana to fetch his wand back from Amina all of that time ago, he couldn't do it. Not whenever what had happened to her was his fault. It had been Care's first act of contrition as far as he was concerned. They ate at different times, he had avoided her. He didn't want to flaunt Lucinda in her face any more than he wanted to hurt every time he looked at her. He had avoided her, avoided the fire that he knew was under her skin. There because he had left her, there because he didn't protect her. The mark that was on her shoulder, marring her soft skin. Burning her up from the inside out. It was his fault. He couldn't face her until he could fix her. Yet. There she was, so close he could just go and scoop her up. So close to the woods. He could carry her down the path. Down the running path that they were all so close to, where they had met and keep holding her until they reached the clearing miles out. He could do it. She was close enough. His eyes snapped shut again, wrinkles forming across the lids from the pressure of holding them closed as he rotated his body toward Kariana. He couldn't understand why, but he held onto her, her hand, rooting him. They hadn't been the best as of late, but he needed her. She knew it. She knew what to do. Her arm wrapped around his own, she was cold too. Was it the wind, or could he not really feel her? “Gavin,” She sounded like she was under water, like she was yelling at him from down a very far train tunnel. He heard her, but she wasn't close enough. It didn't register right. The jitters were starting to take over his hands. One too many pepper up potions today. Normally it wouldn't matter, had his heart not been pumping in over drive, had the panic not set in. He wanted heat, the fire of her skin. He could persuade her, he knew he could. Then none of this would matter...if it weren't for them.

”It may not be what it looks like, it probably isn’t. She isn’t like that.” How would she know? Neither of them really knew her, not any longer. Gavin thought that he did, but he had thought that he had known himself. He had foolishly thought that despite what he said, he would have found some sort of loop hole by now. That he would have fixed this well before his life had turned into this grey muck. If he didn't even know himself, how could he claim to know the girl down the hill? “We can go wherever you want,” his eyes slowly opened. He understood the weight of what she was saying. He understood what she meant, just as he felt the slight tug on his arm to pull him back toward the castle, back to where they needed to be. Back where it was safe, and moderately sane. They both knew that he would be reliving the scene at the bottom of the hill for far longer than was healthy, she wasn't contesting that. He could feel it, but she was trying to help. Like she would have before she had left. She wasn't walking on egg shells any longer. Perhaps that was what he had needed, and just never known it. He could feel something inside of him, cracking, leaving fault lines down some glass surface. Spreading like spider webbing until it no longer looked whole “Wherever you want Gavin.” one last glance down at his bag. He could get it back tomorrow. Somebody would find it and bring it to him. The contents didn't even matter at this point. He was rolling his eyes back up to Kariana whenever he saw it, and the glass pane gave way to the fault lines. Amina was lifted into the air, up and over the mans shoulder. Gavin's eyes honed in on the boys face, as well as he could given the distance. He knew him. Marcus O'Conner. Blood traitor. Of all the people in the world, why did it have to be him? The other boy was no longer of consequence, he had hardly touched Amina's hand. Marcus. Ravenclaw disgrace, shame of his mother. Pearl was on very good terms with the O'Conners. Gavin didn't even dare pollute his tongue with saying the boys name aloud. Gavin couldn't help but to feel insulted. Of all the people. He felt his gaze change, his brow lowering to hood his eyes, alight with rage. He wasn't worthy of the girl he so hap hazardly threw over his back. He couldn't stand for such filth touching her, she was his.

His arm ripped so suddenly from Kariana's grasp, he felt her falling forward. He may have lost quite a bit of his size, but now he was all lean muscle. He was fast, he had to be with all of his running and training. His feet moved before he even knew what he was doing. His brain was still stuck at the top of the hill with Care, lost. His body however, was barreling down the hill in the direction of the disgusting scruffy face that had dared touch Amina. “How dare you.” he stated softly, knowing that no normal ears would have heard it. He couldn't even see Amina for a long moment lost in his rage, his fist was brought backward as his feet left the ground. It wasn't much of a jump, just enough to clear the bottom of the hill and land once more on the flatter surface. As his feet landed again, his balled fist collided with the jawline of the boy. He said nothing, he gaze no reason, he couldn't even think straight. The only way he could stop shaking was by punching the boy, and he did. Again, to the jaw with his other hand and the gut with the first hand. Quickly, 1,2,3, quick shots but not lacking in strength. He hit with a purpose, he wanted to hit again, but Kariana showed up out of nowhere, putting her tiny frame between Gavin and Marcus. Her eyes locked dead into the deep green of his eyes, he could feel her as loudly as if she was screaming in his ears though she never said a word. Her hands handed on his chest, all of her force went to shoving him backward, her fist balling up the fabric of his shirt in some attempt to calm him down. He wouldn't hit the boy again, how could he? His gaze had shifted to Amina, the dark circles under his eyes felt heavier now as he stared at her, unable to breath. His lungs wouldn't function. He couldn't stop staring at her, until once again Kariana's head blocked his target from view, this time the back of her head. She was screaming, why was Care screaming?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
just close my eyes,
(TILL I CAN TAKE IT IN)

words: 1,796
outfit: This
tags: Kariana, Amina, Marcus, Tobias.
notes:none for now I think
credit: gabs of a different color; @ caution 2.0

[Amina Krane]

It had been part of her imagination. It had to be. How many times had her mind played tricks on her by throwing in something about Gavin at random times during the day? Of course, she had gotten better lately. She had actually begun to push her sorrows away, even if it was only by a fraction. At least it was something. The two boys standing in front of her were the main reasons why she was able to do such things. They had provided the much needed distraction that allowed her to still function. Of course, their distractions had been werewolf related, but she found that thinking about her now being a werewolf was actually easier than her thinking about Gavin. Now, it would also be easier than thinking about losing her career path. But somehow, the distraction had worn off. It had allowed her imagination to run again. Getting that single solitary scent out of her head was impossible, but she was going to try. So as she looked up at the two boys from her spot on the ground, she plastered a smile on her face. It was fake at first, but then it began to feel real. For some reason, they caused happiness to become an infection. How did they do that? Had she been the same way before all of this had happened? Had she been the sort of person that could make anyone smile by just looking at them? Many times people had told her that her happiness was infectious, but somehow she couldn't imagine how she had managed such a thing. Now, if there was anything about her that was infectious, it was her depression. More than anything, she wished she could go back to how she used to be, go back to being able to make people smile without fail. Go back to enjoying every aspect of life, much like these two in front of her did. Merlin, how long would it take her to regain everything she had lost?

“Leave no man – fe-man, behind.” Amina chuckled, not entirely sure as to what he meant. But before she could ask, he did something that she never thought would come from him. He did a rather well formed tumble away from where he was standing and into the grass- er, lava. His body sprawled out when he landed, his hand reaching in her direction. Her chuckling had stopped and she stared at him with a slightly awe struck expression. She didn't even move for a moment, unsure of what to think about what he had just done. When she had first run into the pair of them, Tobias had been royally upset that he had possibly lost the game, yet here he was, laying on the grass with a hand outstretched to her. "You'd sacrifice yourself for me?" she muttered, the disbelief evident in her eyes. Of course, it was only a game, but it symbolized more than that. “This is a rescue mission!” His comment caused her smile to reappear and wipe away any shock she still had left. “We will save you!” Biting on her bottom lip, Amina reached out in front of her and grasped his wiggling fingers, her smile turning into a full out grin as she waited for Marcus to join in on the fun. Of course, how he would accomplish such a feat while standing on only a shoe, Amina wasn't sure but she was interested to see how it all panned out. Would Marcus die in the lava with them, or would he be wolf enough to save them both? “Thas righ’, don’t’ye know tha ta crew loses all tha luck when ta birdies lost?!” "Is that so?" she remarked as she found Marcus pulling in Tobias by the ankle. She assisted in her own passage on the way to Marcus and soon found herself next to where Marcus kept his balance on his shoe. No doubt his werewolf blood had assisted in him staying balanced, but she still had to give him commendations for being able to do that.

“Aye look, ta birdie lives… and ye know what tha means?” Amina chuckled, about to question what he meant, but she didn't have a chance because before she could respond, he had her by the hips and was throwing her over his shoulder. Had she not been so caught up in what was going on, she might have reverted back into herself, remembered the last person who had ever carried her like this. She might have just broken down right there and scared the boys with her hysterics. However, they were, once again, a perfect distraction. She couldn't help but laugh. “Tha means I win!” Her laughter grew for a moment before she reached a hand back and ruffled his hair a bit. "Congratulations on your sacrifice-induced victory!" she joked, occasionally glancing at Tobias who was in and out of view as Marcus did some sort of dance around him with a very odd musical track to go along with it. “Yer a good luck charm birdie, ye know that? We’re goin’ ta have ta keep ye now.” Her grin was starting to hurt her cheeks. It had been so long since she had been able to smile this long, genuinely smile. It hurt, but it was a good hurt. A fantastic hurt that made her feel almost human again. She was about to respond about how they couldn't get rid of her even if they wanted to, because she had become attached to the both of them in her own way. Without them, she wasn't sure what she would become again. She would have said that, had the sounds not carried in their direction. Originally, she thought it was just students, students who were talking on their way to dinner. But she recognized the female voice. A little too well. Her whole body went rigid and the enjoyment she had just been experiencing was gone in a flash. The last time she had heard that voice, it had been when she had come back to collect Gavin's wand. He hadn't done it himself, no doubt too upset by what he had found out to come back around her, but he had sent Kariana to do the work. The female didn't know what had happened to Amina, Gavin had kept her secret, but she couldn't help but feel the hatred rolling off of her as the wand exchanged hands. She had sworn after that day that she would avoid Kariana at all costs. She didn't care to fight with Gavin's best friend. It wasn’t worth it. Because despite what happened between all of them, she didn't want to upset him and she knew that would be one way to do it. It looked like she wouldn't be able to avoid it today however.

All focus had been averted to the sounds lingering in the air. She didn't even recognize that Marcus had stopped his taunting of Tobias and his victory laps. Amina didn't even realize that Marcus had recognized the voices sooner than she had and was already on his way to preparing for what she couldn't even consider was going to happen. He set her down on her feet, and fortunately didn't let her go right away because it took a second for her legs to realize they had to do their job again. Once her knees finally locked in place, she was able to stand on her own, but she didn't move an inch past that. She couldn't move. Now that her knees were locked, she was planted where she had been placed. Her eyes were out of focus, her ears focusing on the single, solitary voice instead. The moment she picked out his name, her eyes flicked up in the direction of said voice. Kariana didn't even register at the top of the hill. Amina's eyes went straight to the male figure who was staring down at the trio. It only took the sight of him for Amina's breath to hitch in her throat. Suddenly it was just the two of them. Amina and Gavin. Gavin and Amina. Standing so far away from one another, but it felt like his breath was right on her neck. But it wasn't his breath. "Tobias." Amina's breath started again, but her focus still wasn't entirely back. It wasn't until Marcus' hand landed on her shoulder that she remembered it wasn't just her and Gavin. There were three others who were intruding on their alone time. Three others who were keeping her from being able to talk to him and explain to him how sorry she was that she had lost her pureblood status. How sorry she was that he was having to go through with this wedding. How sorry she was that she couldn't keep him and find a way for them to make it all work.

Her eyes dropped from Gavin momentarily to see that the two boys were now on either side of her, shielding her from the two at the top of the hill. It didn't register why Marcus had placed her in between them, only that he had. It felt strange, but her brain wasn't functioning enough to narrow down the reasons as to such a movement. “Yer goin’ ta remember what I said about us an’ losin’ the birdie, righ’?” Losing the birdie? How were they going to lose her? She was standing right here. But as the sight in front of her changed, as Gavin came charging down the hill, Amina suddenly realized that something was off. Gavin had always been able to cloud her judgment and now was no different. As Gavin came charging in their direction, she didn't even consider what for until his fist connected with Marcus' jaw. Amina's eyes widened and a small squeak escaped her lips. There was no doubt Marcus could withstand the attack, given what he was. He could take a beating all day long and would walk a minute later with no injuries. But that didn't register either. Why wasn't her brain working. A few more hits and something clicked in her head. "Gavin…" Her first attempt was feeble at best, but she couldn't find her voice. Not until another punch landed and Amina realized there was only so much Marcus could take before something worse happened. Marcus fighting back wouldn't be horrible, but if he lost control? Merlin, Gavin had no idea what he was getting into. "Gavin! Stop it!" she shouted, about ready to stand between the two boys until she noticed Kariana had beaten her to the punch. Then his eyes met hers. Her mouth that had been agape closed as she swallowed, unable to think of what else to do. Between them were two bodies that meant nothing at this point. She only wanted them to disappear so she could touch him, hold him, tell him that everything would be ok and they could figure a way out of this mess. She was about to reach out to him, beyond Marcus and Kariana, to tell him just that, but Kariana's voice interrupted that. Merlin, what was going on? What happened to all of that laughter? Why was it now downgraded to screaming and fighting? Squeezing her eyes shut, Amina tried to block it all out, but as she did that, something else began to creep its way in .

Words | 1,910
Tag | Tobias, Marcus, Gavin, Kariana
Outfit | Click

[Tobias Leberecht]

SOMETIMES I FIND IT HARD
• to believe there's someone else who could be •
JUST AS MESSED UP AS ME

Only seconds after he snapped his fingers, he felt Marcus bend over and grab hold of his ankle. Crushing, his ankle. He would have snapped again to signal that, once again, Marcus seemed to have forgotten that Tobias had mortal bones. Easily crushable bones. He was the only one in their trio that did, so it shouldn't have been hard to forget. Yet, the pain that was sneaking up his leg disappointed the second that Amina placed her hand inside of his own. "You'd sacrifice yourself for me?" His stomach gave a big, sloppy flip as his eyes snapped up to admire her golden eyes. Merlin she was made for golden eyes. His goofy smile faded for a long moment, blissfully unaware that anything else was happening around him whatsoever. A bird was chirping in the distance, and heat was radiating through his fingers and up his arms. Everything was perfect, and then he blinked. The familiar flush of that annoying embarrassment reared its ugly head and he forced his goofy smile right back onto his face. All of it had taken under thirty seconds, but there was no way that Amina missed it. How could she? He had no idea of what he was missing in the air around him. He wasn't afforded the same sharp sense of smell like his friends had. To him, it was just an interesting climax to their little game. No sense in letting the Lava take Amina her first trip out. The lava was a cruel mistress, but she could be kind if one knew how to work her. Smiling inwardly at his own thought he felt the tug at his ankle again, pulling him backward. How lucky it really was that nobody else seemed to be on the grounds. No doubt it would have been a very strange thing indeed, seeing one student pulling the entire weight of two other students. Marcus shouldn't have been able to do that, Tobias was a slender man, but he was tall. He felt like his bones weighted a lot. All things considered. Luckily, Marcus had that freaky strong thing going for him. Thas righ’, don’t’ye know tha ta crew loses all tha luck when ta birdies lost?!” It was also lucky that Tobias had managed to find a friend who would play along with just about anything that he said, no matter how crazy. They were a living improv class, the other never said no.

He felt Marcus pulling his body up like it was hollow. Making googly eyes at him and batting his own eyelashes a little too fancily he smiled “My hero” he exclaimed. Since, he did just single handedly save the two from lava, it was the least he could do of course. “Aye look, ta birdie lives… and ye know what tha means? Tha means I win!” laughing throatily, Tobias fell backward into the grass once more. He saw Marcus hoist the girl up, doing a victory lap. It was well deserved. Though, it was a little show boat-y to make the lap around his sprawled out figure. “Yer a good luck charm birdie, ye know that? We’re goin’ ta have ta keep ye now.” For some strange reason, calling her a good luck charm didn't sit quite right with Tobias. Not that she wasn't lucky, but saying it aloud felt like a bad omen. Pushing himself into a seated position with his arms out behind his frame, supporting himself he looked up to Marcus, who was looking at something off in the distance. Taking a glance at the hill he spotted two figures, but thought nothing of it. It was just two of them, who even knew what house they were in or if there was anything to worry about. At least, not until Marcus had stopped his skipping. This was the sort of thing that would make a cat's ears lay flat against their head. Cautious, he watched his friend lower Amina back onto her own feet. They had to be hearing something that Tobias just couldn't. It had happened enough times while he had been with Marcus to recognize whenever he needed to stay silent and trust in Marcus' instincts. “Tobias.” It wasn't even the tone, but the fact that he had used Tobias' proper name that alerted him to the gravity of what must be happening. Hopping hastily to his feet he watched Marcus, not even bothering with whatever the boy must be looking at. Tobias didn't bode well with the uncertain, but he blindly trusted Marcus. He allowed himself to be moved without protest, standing behind Amina easily, he could see clear over her head so it was no issue. Yer goin’ ta remember what I said about us an’ losin’ the birdie, righ’?” Thank Merlin he was speaking in confusing terms. If Marcus hadn't Tobias might not have understood. He tended to think more clearly the more complicated a sentence was. As strange at it was, he was strange. Slowly, he nodded just once. Whatever was coming, it was for Amina. He might not know her well, and he knew that she was a little better equipped to handle herself than he was, he wasn't going to let anything happen to her. He had a few tricks that she didn't know anything about.

Tobias might have known the couple that staggered their way down the hill, but he didn't have time to ponder just who they were. Only they fact that he large male was attacking his best friend. It should have been Tobias' task to attempt to defend his friend. In no way was Tobias a fighter, he was defense...at best. But he had been charged with a task. Marcus had said to protect the bird, wolf bird, bird, and that was what he was going to do. As the fist connected with Marcus' face and a strangled sqeak left Amina's lips he grabbed hold of her bicep, and pulled the two of them back a few paces. Marcus was strong, he could handle whatever it was that was happening. Amina, well, she was new. To put it lightly, he didn't feel like getting bit. He had no idea why Marcus was being attacked or why their little fun had been interrupted, he didn't know what Amina looked as pale as a ghost or why she was holding her body so still. All he knew, was that whatever it was, it couldn't possibly be good. He couldn't let her emotions take a hold of her, they couldn't afford for her to shift out in the open like this. Nobody was supposed to know her secret. These other students wouldn't even know what to do with themselves if they came face to snout with a bushy wolf face. Amina would be upset with herself. Letting go of her torso as a far more familiar face made itself present. Travers was the Slytherin Quidditch captain, and as Tobias played Quidditch, he had to know her face. She was certainly not shy about showing her dislike for his oddities. He knew that she felt he was beneath her, and the memories of her teasing didn't sit well in his stomach. "Gavin…" Gavin. Dewhurst. Slytherin Keeper. So, it would seem that he did know these two after all. Yet, it felt like so much more than house based rivalry. What was he missing? Why did Amina know them? He had never even seen her so much as talking to a member of Slytherin house. He wasn't with her all the time, but it just didn't feel right. . "Gavin! Stop it!"  Why did she sound so concerned? He was so very confused. Travers was screaming now, it was too loud in his head, making his ears ring. He wasn't a social man for a reason. Oddly intimidated and wanting to help he turned to Marcus desperately, looking to him for some sort of clue. He knew that Marcus wouldn't be in danger of losing his temper. Merlin what was happening? Why was everybody so angry. Cautiously, he leaned forward, hoping against hope that his voice might calm at least Amina for just a moment. “Amina.” he said softly, but he knew she heard him, she had to. He was standing too close. “Amina...” he wanted to know how to help, what to say to make her feel better, his eyes cut to Marcus again, begging for intervention.

TAGGED ! amina, marcus, kariana, gavin
WORDS ! 1,413
OUTFIT ! CLICK
LYRICS ! sometimes by skillet
TEMPLATE ! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ! -hello

[Kariana Gabrielle Travers]

She listened to the feeble way his words wound themselves around the air, giving physical manifestation to the bone numbing hurt that had seized him from the very moment he’d heard whatever had propelled him to the spot they now stood rooted upon, watching in abject horror as the scene set itself before them. It was the closest Kariana had been to the girl since she’d retrieved the wand for Gavin, the nearest she’d allowed herself to come lest she lose her temper. Not that the avoidance had been one sided, she was sure. The sight of the girl laughing on the ground below them while the man at her side had a hard time keeping himself moving sent fissures of fury sweeping through her, threatening to pull her under. She was playing while he broke, smiling when Kariana had watched day in and out since her return on his birthday as he attempted to keep his life from spiraling even further out of control. It was almost enough to gag her, her fingers folding even tighter over his as if to keep him routed. She was nearly spitting with rage, the flame within her veins roaring- demanding penance of the raven haired female now within her sight. Her emotions were awhirl, and she could only imagine what it was doing to Gavin. It was why she’d twined herself closer to him, rooting him as much as she could to the present; away from what it was they were watching. She wanted to kill the bitch, watch her body rot in upon itself. But she wouldn’t. To harm the girl would harm Gavin; she knew it as surely as she knew her own name. And he couldn’t react. Not in the way he’d see fit to, not with blinders folded over his eyes. Because, standing on top of the hill with him she understood what exactly had gone wrong these past few months. Not everything, no- she had barely discovered the tip of what had gone on while she’d been away; she wasn’t nearly foolish enough to assume that she had. But she hadn’t pushed to find out either. She’d realized there were holes in the information she had, understood that she wasn’t privy to nearly all of the details that surrounded the story within… but she hadn’t asked for more, hadn’t demanded answers in any of the areas she should have. She’d been so selfishly concerned with righting things between the two of them that she hadn’t paused to dig deeper unto the root of the problem. So focused in setting her studies back up into proper standing that she hadn’t demanded nearly what she would have normally. She’d gone about treating this situation as if it were one of Regulus’s many broken hearted escapades, not understanding just how differently the two needed to be handled. Because like her Gavin didn’t do relationships. Like her Gavin didn’t bring people into the fold of their close-knit group. Regulus fell in and out of love like a girl with her first crush, moving from one to the other without any real pause between. Gavin had brought Amina into every aspect of his life, shown himself on levels that she doubted that even many in their group got to witness… and he’d had it torn from him, had her decline to fight for the worth he’d placed on top of her. She could remember Rodolphus and the way she had felt when he’d left, remember the way things seemed to dull in comparison, remembered how difficult it had been for her to carry on with her natural routine. And she hadn’t come anywhere close to loving him the way Gavin had Amina… did Amina, the look on his face was still too raw to deny it.

She had failed him again, without ever even leaving his side this time. The resolve that stole through her was familiar; straightening her spine, setting her features into an icy mask. It was the same resolve she slipped into before a big game, only intensified. She fed all of her anger, her hurt, the very fire that threatened to consume her into that resolve, pushing it until it was a single chasm- a single flame flickering in the back of her mind. She could still feel it, the emotion there lingering beneath the surface, waiting for her to slip even a little. But she didn’t have time to focus on her own thoughts, on whatever doubts may have been lingering behind each phrase that tumbled across her brain. She had to focus on Gavin now, she needed to read Gavin in the way that she knew only she could- because he depended on it. Him escaping this thing unscathed was impossible, the girl at the bottom of the hill had seen to that the minute she grasped the Gryffindor’s hand. But they could still walk away; still make it back to the castle. That was all they had to do, make it back to the castle. She’d work with him to get him whatever he wanted after that. If he wanted the girl back she’d dig for the right questions and ask him until she had the full picture, until she could help him piece it all back together. If he wanted Lucinda gone, she’d make that happen too. She didn’t have a game plan right now; she hadn’t really had a game plan for anything this whole time. But she could make one. All they had to do was turn and leave before their presence was noted, before someone did something stupid. More stupid than the fucking prat picking Amina up by her waist and swinging her about as if she was some prize to be won. She just needed to keep his attention diverted long enough to get them out of here, to get them somewhere she could being to set into motion the actions that needed to be taken from here. It was with all of this in mind that she watched as her words finally seemed to sink into him, his lashes opening to reveal the orbs she’d become so familiar with. He just needed to look at her. At her and not the debauchery going on beneath them, so long as she held his focus they still had a chance of walking away from here. She watched his eyes shift and tensed, relaxing only marginally as she saw in what direction they’d headed. His bag. Fuck. Yes. They could leave that here; he didn’t need it right now. Not really. She could replace the whole damn thing; buy him whatever it was that rested in its contents if he walked away here and now. Hope flared within her chest, pushing out at the edges as he started to turn back to her again. Only she didn’t have to question this time the movement that had him freezing in place. She’d already witnessed the beginnings of it, already drawn any and all implications that could be drawn from the action. There weren’t words to utter this time, no lie could force its way past her lips to him at the sight before them.


“Gavin,” she settled for a harsh gasping of his name as his body was torn from her, setting her own so off balance she found herself rushing towards the ground. She’d centered her gravity around his, forced herself into the plain so as to hold him at bay, to hold him together, and it only seemed to aid in her falling hand over head as he sprinted down off the hill. She didn’t pause to try and right herself, she couldn’t afford the time it would waste. Gavin was in motion, a force that even the derailment that might wait for him at the end of the hill wouldn’t be able to stop completely. She settled instead for tucking her body upon itself, rolling head over legs with her appendages tucked in as tightly as humanly possible until she came to a stop. Not that the uneven ground didn’t claim her anyways, forcing her ankle to turn at an odd enough angle to twist- her right wrist the object which finally halted her fall with a sickening crunch. She rolled upwards, ignoring the protesting stiffness of her muscles already weary after practice- straightening herself as fast as she possibly could and following in the wake of anger Gavin had departed in. Anger at a boy for touching what he shouldn’t. Rightful anger, a part of her brain whispered even as another rebelled against the very idea... They’d flanked her as if to protect her, as if to save her… as if Gavin would ever harm her intentionally. The thought was sobering as she sped her legs into a run as he approached Marcus. Who, stupidly enough, did nothing to back out of the way of the boy barreling towards him down the hill. It was almost eerie the way things seemed to suspend themselves in slow motion even as she herself sped up. The traitor stood his ground, squaring off as if to intercept Gavin and Kariana almost laughed at the ridiculousness of it. He was muscled in his own way but even he wouldn’t be able to stand up to Gavin, even given his deteriorated state. Even if he had managed to pull the boy from his perch on the shoe. She’d only barely made it down the hill when Gavin’s fist connected to the Ravenclaw’s jaw, her own lips twisting upwards in a twisted smile. Only to freeze on her face as she watched the boy’s head jerk back into place as if he’d barely been hit. Gavin may not have been as burly as he once might have been but she doubted that Marcus took enough blows to the face to withstand it like that, as if it had barely phased him… her eyebrows knitted together as she skidded to a halt a few paces behind the grouping, her fingers curling in on themselves as she looked over to Amina being dragged backwards by Tobias, golden eyes widened in horror. She paused again, breath stilling in her chest as she looked back at the boy Gavin landed another punch into the boy’s jaw line. The same golden eyes stared defiantly out at her friend, anger twisting his features where she had expected pain. He should have dropped already at least, Gavin was… debilitating when angry, and she’d witnessed it often enough first hand.
The same golden hue… her mind whirred quickly over the scene before her, pausing briefly on what she remembered being uttered about Amina’s eyes. Some type of beauty enhancement… Only she’d seen those eyes before, outside of school when in her grandmother’s home. She’d seen eyes just like that. Talked derisively to the owners. Because they were nothing more than dogs… Her heart seemed to freeze within her chest before picking up double time, beating erratically against her ribs as she looked back over to Amina, her eyes widening. Pieces fell into place, filling the puzzle that had been lain before her these past few months unsolved. Dogs. It tainted the blood, pushed changes upon those who were so tainted. Pages of textbook danced before her unseeing eyes, shock sending a stuttered breath from out of her lips. Wolves. It explained all the holes in the story, filled in the silences Gavin had lapsed into during his explanations. White hot anger built up within her chest as her gaze narrowed upon the girl now saying Gavin’s name, uttering it like she had a right. This is what had torn them apart. This was what had kept her from fighting for him? Derision filled her slitted gaze before the other girl uttering his name once more had her turning her head towards the sight of Gavin starting in on the boy’s stomach. No, not the boy. The mutt. Suddenly the sight of Gavin’s fists driving into his flesh was no longer welcomed by her mind, her panic seizing her in much the same way it had upon first thinking the words. Gavin was in danger the longer he pummeled into the boy, risking himself in ways she wasn’t sure if he was aware of or not. Without thinking it through she propelled herself forwards once more, throwing herself between the two figures even as she saw Marcus’s hand raise, if only slightly. She pressed her way in between them, forcing her frame into Gavin’s vision and fixing him with the whole of her gaze. She couldn’t focus on the fact that she had a wolf at her back… two if she counted the one being shepherded. Couldn’t focus on anything except removing Gavin from the harm he’d thrown himself into. Her hands slid over his chest easily, fingers clutching at the fabric beneath like the lifeline they were. Focusing all of her weight on the front of her body she shoved, following his movements with her own, pushing until she no longer felt the searing heat tearing through the clothing at her back.
She kept her gaze focused on his, waiting for him to make another move until his own eyes shifted away, past her. The pain that seemed to grip her heart only seemed to intensify, her form falling against his momentarily, aligning herself with him once more- only this time to ground them both. His ex-girlfriend was a werewolf. She knew enough to know she hadn’t always been, couldn’t have- not with the way things had gone down. The reality of it all seemed to settle onto her shoulders, her breathing slowing. Gavin was out of harm’s way now, she stood between them, and while she held no illusions that her frame was large enough to completely shield him she hoped the blood traitor had enough control not to press forward. A hope that was short lived as she heard the grass behind her crunch, heightened senses sending her heart back into a galloping pace. Without thought her head whipped around, features contorting in fury as she caught the girl still sandwiched between the other two boys. “Bitch.” The word was laced with a hate so poignant as to fill the air, double meaning hitching on the raised voice it came out in. “You don’t get to say his name!”The words ripped themselves from her lips even as she clutched tighter to her grip upon Gavin’s shirt. “NOW. CALL. OFF. YOUR. FUCKING. MUTT.” Her body trembled from the force of anger whipping around inside of her, threatening to tear her apart. But she couldn’t let it. Not yet. She had to get Gavin out of her, had to get him away from the figure looming just out of her peripheral, even if he had paused.




WORDCOUNT:: 2,473
MUSICPLAYING:: Bottoms Up by Nickelback
CURRENTMOOD:: Anxious
POSTTAGGEDFOR:: Gavin, Amina, Marcus, Tobias
CHARACTEROUTFIT::
AUTHORSNOTES:: n/a

TEMPLATE CREATED BY YOUR SWEET DEMISE of CAUTION 2 THE WIND

[Marcus O'Conner]

living is easy with eyes closed

- - - - misunderstanding all you see - - - - 

He very much wanted to rewind time back to only moments before when he’d been ignoring the subtle jibes aimed at him about his ethically questionable win. It had been so easy only moments before, watching his friend traverse new territory, obviously confused as to what was going on. He’d been doing a victory dance lap for fucks sake, enjoying the ease the three of them existed in with one another. Had the two figures just gone on around the corner of the castle he might not have had to wish the moment back, they could have continued on the way they had been going with only the slight interruption of Amina’s stumble. That was easily recoverable with as resilient as she was, as she’d already proven time again in their short friendship to be. But for whatever unfathomable reason the two had come ‘round the corner and upon their small group of friends in the heights of their merriment. On the best day in the best circumstances that didn’t bode well. Not with the two that were fast approaching. Travers herself was poison on her own; he’d been to the Hospital Wing on more than one occasion. A fanatic at heart, she clung to the very ideals that had put him in the position he was now in. And Gavin… had situations been different he might have been walking with them now, would have been expected to. He didn’t have it in him though; somehow the poison that seemed to lace the veins of so many from his background had skipped past him. In any other circumstance the figures on the top of the hill would have been cause for concern, but today with the company they kept it made for a dangerous mix. He didn’t like situations like this, avoided them at all costs. Situations like this were the reason he spent all holidays possible at Robert’s or the castle. Situations like this were too fraught with tension, too tempting to the wolf that lay just beneath his skin. He’d fought so hard for the control he exerted over it, prided himself on the level he’d finally reached after all of these years. He knew it was about to be tested, knew it would have to be. Even without his personal knowledge of the two, he’d had access to a set of memories that had been far closer to the pair, seen far more intimately than he had. A set of memories that had shown him the lack of humanity that the two possessed. Or rather, the over abundance they had in all of the negative aspects of the human condition. He fought a monster within his own skin daily, a supernatural being that hungered for control on the best of days… and he controlled it. These two had no such excuse. He’d watched the way Gavin had torn their Bird apart, introduced her to a new world only to rip it from her grasps just because of what she, what they were. He was all too familiar with that. He’d tried not to focus too intently upon the way the girl he was setting down was reacting, tried not to look too closely into the emotions that were fighting through irises so similar to his own.

He could hear clearly the conversation taking place at the top of the hill, one sided as it now was, hear the way Travers’ seemed to be pleading with Gavin. He only hoped he’d take her advice and walk away, leave them where they were. He had no reason to come down here, no reason to be glaring murder down at them as he had been. He’d left her. His nostrils flared once more as the breeze brought another poignant whiff of the pair and with it a realization that had his worry mounting. The boy had smelled off, he’d already realized that. It wasn’t until now that he got just what it was that was causing it. There was something wrong with his blood, something artificial coursing throughout his body that didn’t belong. The staccato rhythm of his heartbeat was more than slightly unnatural as well, the way he seemed poised on edge taking on a new light. The boy was on something. Marcus was nowhere near familiar enough with whatever it was he’d taken to identify it though, he wasn’t even sure he wanted to. How had Amina gotten mixed up with the likes of him? He’d seen glimpses of the person he’d been when with her, not all of them flattering in the least… though some had suggested that he wasn’t entirely as he seemed from the outside. Though Marcus knew well enough not to trust her version of events, she’d loved him… it could easily have clouded her view of her own memories. He’d barely had time to finish reminding Amina of his offhanded comment from earlier, so much more important now that the trio had become five, than he realized Gavin was moving quickly down the hill, the girl behind him stumbling in his wake. Weren’t the two supposed to be friends? He couldn’t imagine letting any of his friends fall as Gavin just had, especially not a female… The idea of Amina or Victoria being in place of the darkhaired girl tumbling down the hill was enough to have Marcus clenching his own jaw, eyes tracking the movements of the one who’d ripped his arm from her grasp. It looked like he wouldn’t be taking her offer after all… “How dare you.” The words fell upon his ears as if the boy had been only feet from him instead of yards, filling him with the smallest amount of confusion before he moved forward to distance himself further from Amina, being sure to keep her still behind him.
It was all he was afforded before Gavin was in front of him, fist flying out to connect heavily with his jaw. The pain lanced quickly through the muscle and tissue covering the bone, receding a good deal slower than he might have liked. The force of it had thrown his head back, his neck protesting as he righted it once more, looking out before him, and refusing to budge a muscle. He was there. Just beneath his skin. Clawing his way up, begging to be unleashed. All he had to do was let him out and he knew that it would be the end of it, all he needed. He knew all he had to do was move and the wolf would take it as permission, flooding his being with the endorphins and adrenaline he could only get from the change. Every muscle felt heavy on him, weighing him down to the ground on his two legs that suddenly felt so unnatural. He could see the girl just beyond him, her face frozen in-between a savage grin and a glare. Without meaning to he felt his own muscles twitching to recuperate, eyes meeting hers for the briefest of seconds before hands, two this time in tandem, connected with him. His jaw clenched, canines lengthening within his closed lips, tearing at the surface of his gums- at the edges of his lips as he fought back down the beast. He wanted to lash out at the boy before him. Not for the pain he was inflicting on his body, at least not in entirety- but for all the memories he’d had to bear witness to since shifting with Amina. For all the pain he’d caused with his refusal to look past what he’d been brought up in, the same world Marcus himself came from. The parallels were so blatantly ironic it was all Marcus could do to fight the sardonic smile that wanted to phase over his features. At least there was something humorous out of this whole thing, even if the humor wasn’t totally on the level. "Gavin…" He tensed as Amina’s voice made its way into the fray, both sides of his nature recognizing the plea in the voice. Pack. His mind reverberated with the word, because that was what she was. That was what Tobias was, in his own way. They were his pack. And Marcus was a creature that needed those bonds, that needed to protect those bonds. He found himself reacting to the panic laced in her words, body stiffening as he turned his gaze fully upon the one who was pounding into him, fading out the pain to focus on the unguarded rage in his features- in his eyes. It would be so easy to use that against him. To move himself just so and completely deflect his next attack, to turn it on himself. He could do that without losing control, he was sure of it. "Gavin! Stop it!" So easy. He went to move his hand up, anticipating the next punch to come… only it never did.
His body froze instantly as the figure wound its way between them, dark hued locks throwing him off momentarily before the scent hit his nostrils. Amina was still back behind Tobias, still protected. It was the other girl who was shoving her way between them, the fabric of her clothing brushing against his as she pushed back on her companion, surprising Marcus. Hadn’t she seemed pleased that he’d begun to take his rage out on him? Why then would she throw herself between the two of them when Marcus hadn’t even really moved yet? His hand dropped back slowly as he realized just what he had been about to do, his head shaking slightly as if to rid himself of the impulse to continue. Travers was tiny. Extraordinarily so. It wouldn’t take much to remove her from between them and incapacitate the other… The scent of her fear hit him hard as she pushed back on Gavin, bringing her body closer to his for a moment. Her fear was… palpable, heady in its aroma. It fueled the beast, called to him in a way her anger never could. There was definitely anger there too, but the fear was so much sweeter- so much stronger, thrumming in time with her heart beating the blood through her limbs. He twitched in place, inhaling deeply. Fear. She was afraid of him. She’d never been afraid of him before. The feral grin that broke his lips as she finally succeeded in removing Gavin from his space was short lived, the man inside him tamping it down with disgust he hadn’t felt for himself in so long it came as a shock. Her fear didn’t decrease even as she came to a stop with Gavin, her body falling against his almost, slightly enough that had he not been watching so closely he might have missed it. The predator in him screamed to take the short steps between them, begged him to get closer to the cloying scent that seemed to have taken over his senses. He couldn’t help it, the small step he took forward, his mind clouding slightly as the scent neared- intensified. His entire body thrummed with anticipation, pulsing on the edge… “Bitch.” only to be brought back down as her venomous voice filled the space for the first time since up on the hill. “You don’t get to say his name!” He could feel the withdrawl from behind him, sense Amina’s wolf rising to the surface, calling to him as well. Almost as if both wolves were in agreement, in tandem. They wanted this, craved it, were reacting to one another. It was that that had him pushing the animal inside him back with an unequaled force, holding it just barely at bay as he glanced over his shoulders at the girl once more huddling within herself, reminding him of a different night…
He met Tobias’s questioning gaze levelly, hoping he could convey all he could in that single glance. He needed Tobias to take care of her, they couldn’t turn their backs on these two, couldn’t walk away. He needed to keep them off to the side, away from Amina as long as possible. If he was having this much trouble with his wolf he didn’t even want to think about what it was she was doing to keep hers at bay. He could practically feel the tremors from off of her; feel the responding routes of his own body. “NOW. CALL. OFF. YOUR. FUCKING. MUTT.” Her fear suddenly seemed more in place, he should have known she would know their secret if Gavin did- though it put the boys stunt from earlier in a much more manic light. He couldn’t help the snort that came from him though, as if that insult would really affect him. He’d been called much worse on a regular basis by his own mother, this girl who meant nothing to him- who barely knew him couldn’t get him where his mother hadn’t. Those scars had long grown over. He found himself once more orienting his body between them, watching Travers follow his movements out of the corner of her eyes, watched the tightening of skin around her eyes as he did so. He just needed to keep them away from Amina. “What kind of man are you protecting Travers?” The words were slow, foreign on his tongue. They didn’t sit right with him, but the wolf inside him rejoiced, added a dark tone to them that hadn’t been. He’d meant to leave it at that, but seeing the way she clutched him- possessive. He knew the rumors about the two, had heard more than enough. “That lets his whore fight his battles?” The words were out before he could think about them, inflicting as much derision into the word whore as possible, looking down at her with an expression of scorn on his face. He’d learnt from the best, grown up in his mother’s household. A small part of him felt the revulsion at how similar his tone came out then, the only difference the growl that caressed the word whore, painting her for what she was- and identifying himself as well- just in case she’d had any doubts. ”I can smell you.” More unbidden words fought their way up his throat, the chuckle that fled past his lips sinister as he took another step forward, reveling at how she flinched almost imperceptively into the body she was so intent on protecting. Watching as her knuckles colored white against their grip on his shirt.

tag Gavin, Kariana, Amina, Tobias
words 2,416
lyrics strawberry fields forever - the beatles
credit a girl with kaleidoscope eyes @ caution 2.0
wearing this

[Gavin Dewhurst]

i'll bare my skin,
(AND I'LL COUNT MY SINS)
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A fog was rolling in out of the forest, moving closer to their feet. Not too dense but enough to send a chill up the bottoms of his pants legs. Apart from the screaming the grounds were silent. The sun had finished it's crawl down the horizon and the light was finally fading to give way to the sliver of moon that had been peeking out through the clouds almost all day long. He wasn't shaking because of the cold though. No doubt all of the students were starting to head back toward the dorms now, curfew would be only a couple of hours away he imagined. Time just tended to pass far more quickly whenever he was this distracted. Given that almost everybody in their unfortunate gathering was a prefect, it was unlikely that any of them would be missed. Nobody would come looking for them. He didn't think, he didn't even know what it was that he was supposed to be doing on his rounds this night, and he didn't care. All he cared about what the woman so very close, and the woman shouting in her face. Even the forest was keeping quiet to witness what was about to happen. Was this what a heart attack felt like? He couldn't be sure. Merlin, she was so beautiful. He could tell that she was looking at him, he could feel the weight of her stare. For one, tiny, blissful moment a smile crossed his face and he was able to breath again. She was like oxygen, made all things better. Just being so close to her felt like he was recovering, really getting to open his eyes for the first time in months. His eyes darted to the forest, blocking out all other sound of the people surrounding them. He couldn't see anybody but her. Only her. It was always going to be only her. As Gavin's eyes settled back onto her face, honing in on her warm brown eyes...only, they weren't brown any more. How could he have forgotten? They glittered now, even in the fading sunlight. That was his fault, her being in the company of these fools was his fault. She should have been walking with Kariana and he. They should have been heading back up together, like nothing was wrong. His gaze diverted to the ground, the sounds of the people around him filling his head, his anger flooding back in an instant as he was shoved backward. Kariana's hand still balling up the front of his shirt. Honestly, he was grateful, he needed the rock. Something to tether him to the ground, to remember why he had even come down here in the first place.

It wasn't something that he was proud of, the fact that Gavin knew Marcus. They were the same age, they might have even been distantly related somehow for all he knew. Gavin knew his family, knew the tree and the ties that were always attached to their proud family name. He had even been friends with Marcus once, not close by any standards. Yet, whenever all the pure blooded families got together during the summer, they had played more than a few rugby matches together. Marcus was supposed to have been one of them. He didn't know how, or why the boy had been sorted into Ravenclaw, he was meant to be a snake. All he knew was what his mother had told him. The boy was a bad egg, never to be spoken to again. He had been raised knowing which people were and were not acceptable to be seen talking to. He had been given very strict orders to avoid the boy. Oh, his brothers were still friends with Everett, Gavin's own older brother. It wasn't the whole family that was bad, just the boy. There was something wrong with him. Which was even more reason to keep him away from Amina. Enough had happened to her this year, she didn't need to be further tainting herself by keeping company with this one. Gavin could feel something dripping from his hand, it must have been where the skin of his knuckles had broken. He knew that he had punched the boy hard, with everything that he had in him. Letting the blame for everything into the punch, placing all blame onto him for the last few months, for his own unhappiness. Gavin had always had a reputation for using words rather than violence. He wasn't the sort to snap and physically abuse any students he didn't like. He ignored them, moved on with his day. That tended to send the same message in most cases, hurt just as badly. This, wasn't one of those cases. If he had been thinking clearly, he would have known that something about the whole thing was off. Something more than just Amina in the company that she had chosen. Something, more. He would have noticed, but he couldn't. He didn't see that there were no bruises on the boys face, that he was still standing starkly upright in spite of the gut blow. He didn't notice the fire in the boys own golden eyes, didn't draw the parallels from the boys eyes to the ones that he loved so very much. He didn't notice how similar, that there was something twitchy about the boy he had hit. He didn't see any of it. He could only see the despair on Amina's face, forcing an all new feeling into his body. It wracked his chest, almost to the point of convulsing. This was hurting her, being this close to her was hurting her, hadn't he hurt her enough? Hadn't he done enough? Cursing her the way that he had? Merlin what had he been thinking? His foot lifted just off the ground, but not enough to stop the blades of grass from touching the bottom of his shoe. He couldn't feel the hand on his chest that would have stopped him had he actually attempted to take a step in any direction at all, she was holding him in place. Why? Why did she stop him? She knew what that disgrace was, knew how he was nothing more than a burn mark on his family tree. She knew, that if anybody deserved his wrath it was that pitiful excuse for a boy standing so rigidly. He hadn't even fought back. The coward. He had to know he was reaching too far above his station to dare even speak to Amina. Her family might have been disgraced, but they hadn't singled her out. No, whatever he had done, was worse than her crimes. Even with her tainted blood. Gavin wasn't even aware of the fact that heat was pumping through his veins again, raising his temperature, his hand shook at his sides, wanting to curl upward into fists again.

“Bitch.” he heard the word, but didn't know who Care could be talking to, not Marcus...but then, Amina? His eyes shifted to stare daggers into the back of the girls head. He thought that he had been very clear a few minutes ago. She had no right. He had warned her, not verbally but he had warned her. She should have known better than to stop him if this was what she was going to do. He didn't even want her thinking Amina's name. She wore her opinions a little too clearly in her eyes for him to tolerate it. He didn't want to hear her blaming Amina, she had no idea what she was talking about. None of this was her fault, it was his. Amina was the victim here. “You don’t get to say his name!” His hand lifted, gripping her oddly colored wrist. Prying it slowly off of his shirt. She would pay for that comment, perhaps not now, but she would. He could feel her fingers protesting, wanting to hold onto him but he didn't allow it. Wrenching her hand just far enough to make his nonverbal point. “NOW. CALL. OFF. YOUR. FUCKING. MUTT.” What? Confusion clouded his face for a moment, Amina hadn't done anything, even if she had, how in Merlin's name did Kariana know? He had never told her, he had kept her dirty secret. Gavin's eyes moved at a frantic pace from one face to another, not lingering on any one, until they settled back on Marcus, then Amina, and back to Marcus. His eyes. Golden, darker than Amina's but there was no hiding their base. Golden eyes. His eyebrows lifted in shock, his lips parting. Had he done this to Amina? Things were starting to fall into place. No wonder his family had shunned him, they had every right. He didn't belong in their ranks. Amina had run from the castle and run into a Marcus, who had selfishly stayed on campus for his shift. He had done this, he had stolen her and was now flaunting it around the castle. He had turned Amina. The weight of the realization made his head ache and his eyes swim. How could she? How could she stay with the man who had mangled her perfect figure? Were they, something else....something, more?

Bile instantly made itself present in the back of his throat, Merlin he was going to be sick. He knew he had no right, he had no more claim to her but he couldn't fight the reaction. If she was with him, out of all of the people, if she was with him he didn't know what he was going to do. The potion he had taken just after practice was forcing his emotions to run endless through his mind, he couldn't settle on one and it was making him erratic. “What kind of man are you protecting Travers?” His eyes were crazed, if Gavin could see himself he wouldn't have even know just who was looking out of them. How dare he insult him, Marcus, insulting Gavin, in any other light the very idea would have been laughable. Given the knowledge that he had just gleaned from his eyes, thinking he knew what he knew about he and Amina...the comment took on a whole other depth. One that said he was better for Amina than Gavin was. Gavin was a lot of things, but that would never be true. Not if he had done such a horrible thing to her. They were both at fault, and Marcus didn't even have the decency to care. “That lets his whore fight his battles?” shoving himself in front of Kariana he stood tall, just a few inches on the dog he now knew Marcus to be. ”I can smell you.” Disgusting. Gavin spat at the ground next to Marcus' feet. Did he really think that he would be intimidated? That Kariana would? Let him turn into a rabid animal. Gavin would be more than happy to put him down. Things like him had no place in this world. His leg shook, his foot finding purchase on the ground, just enough to take off on. He wanted to provoke Marcus, he craved it in a way he knew wasn't natural. It was the alteration in his blood. He had just shoved off at a spring to tackle the dolt into the grass whenever he heard it. Something that made him blood run cold. A growl, and it didn't come from the boy that he had been facing. Amina, she had growled. Gavin's body changed directions so quickly his body landed hard onto the still warm ground. If she was growling, something bad was going to happen. As much rage as he had for Marcus, the need to keep Amina from doing what he just knew was coming was stronger. He couldn't even think, he just moved. Using his knee to leverage his body from a push up position he moved.

"Don't you dare…" Something was wrong. There was something off about her voice. He knew her, and in his mind all he could remember was back at the dorm all those months ago whenever she had punched him. Her eyes had warned him, that was as far as she could be pushed and he could hear it now in her voice. He didn't even have time to be angry at Kariana for saying the things that she did. He didn't even know if he was moving in what felt like slow motion toward Amina. If only he could get to her, he could help. He just knew it. Again, the other three people seemed to fade. Next to nobody had ever seen he and Amina together, not really. Kariana had witnessed them as a 'couple' but hardly seen them together. He knew Kariana was aware of how he felt about Amina, he just didn't think she knew the depth of it, the power in it. She knew what the lack of it was doing to him, but it was so much more than that. Grass was sticking to his palms and he could feel a sting in his knees as he moved, righting himself in front of her. His hands were a mess of grass stained green and blood still clotting in his knuckles. “Amina, no” he pleaded, it was little more than a breath as he pleaded with her. His arms moved to grab her shoulders, thinking foolishly that he could help, he loved her he needed to love her. He needed to help her, this was his fault. Something was wrong with her skin, where his hands made contact, he thought at first it was her hair, but it wasn't, it was fur, slowly moving out of her pores. He held contact with her eyes for as long as he could, until they weren't her eyes any longer, they were the eyes of something else. “Amina.” he pleaded, no hiding the desperation in his voice, there was no pride, only concern. Something was tearing his body backward. Away from Amina, no, he wanted to tell them no, he could stop this, it was his fault and he had to undo it. Something pulled his body to the ground, and he couldn't help but to stare upward in abject horror as the woman he loved became, something else.

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just close my eyes,
(TILL I CAN TAKE IT IN)

words: 2,382
outfit: This
tags: Kariana, Amina, Marcus, Tobias.
notes:There it goes.
credit: gabs of a different color; @ caution 2.0

[Amina Krane]

The scene unfolding in front of her was something out of a movie. Or maybe a dream. Yes, that had to be it. Because where else would two separate parts of her life clash in such a horrific way? Right in front of her? The side of her life that she had ripped away from her was now fighting with the side of her life that had helped her pick up the pieces left behind. More than anything, Amina just wanted to wake up. She wanted to find out that she really was floating in some deep dark abyss of REM sleep. Her dreams had been playing tricks on her for so long now, it wouldn't be that surprising if it was a dream, but she knew the truth. The truth was this wasn't a dream. This was reality. Gavin and Kariana were here, right now. Gavin had charged down that hill, full boar, and practically jumped Marcus. For what reason, Amina couldn't understand. They weren't together anymore. He had made it abundantly clear over time that there was no hope for the two of them, especially now that she was no longer pure. He had told her that she needed to move on and be happy. Yet the moment she finds some sliver of happiness in her life, he comes and shatters it with punches to the face and gut of one of the two people who had helped create that happiness? She just didn't understand. Why couldn't he stop hurting her? Why couldn't he just make up his mind and decide if they were together or they weren't; if she was allowed to be happy or if she had to be miserable for her whole life?

The grip of Tobias' hand on her arm didn't even register in her head. Nor did the fact that he was pulling her away from the dramatic scene that was playing out in front of them. She was drowning in confusion and bordering on the edge of hysterics, having such a hard time keeping her head above water. Even with her eyes shut, Amina could hear the shuffling in front of her, she could hear Kariana increasing the distance between the three of them, Marcus doing the same as he took a backwards step in her direction. Somehow, she also was aware that Gavin's eyes were still on her, but she couldn't bring herself to look at him. To look into those eyes that once used to provide so much comfort, so much love, and now only brought confusion and pain. "Amina." The voice swam in her head for a moment and Amina began to wonder if she had imagined someone saying her name. But then she remembered whose voice it was. It was Tobias. He had been the one to take her back from the scene a little, to pull her directly out of the line of fire. A friend. "Amina…" Her eyes finally opened and she let out a breath she hadn't been aware she had been holding. Everything told her to turn around and to run, to get away from there and even take Tobias with her to be the rock she needed. Marcus could handle himself against the two of them. But her feet were rooted. She couldn't even look over to Tobias who sounded so calm, no doubt for her sanity. Only if she could channel that calm, if she could use it to calm down herself, but her heart was racing so fast. Too fast. It felt like it would explode if it didn't pop out of her chest any second. She couldn't catch her breath. Why was all of this happening? What had gone so wrong?

“Bitch.” The single solitary word made Amina's eyes snap straight to Kariana, her expression going stone cold. As if she had needed just a focal point, Amina's breath suddenly slowed and her heart rate dropped down to a reasonable speed. But it wasn't a good thing. No, the fact that she had collected herself so quickly was in fact a bad thing, but somehow she didn't recognize that the wolf was there, trying to claw its way out of its cage. The only thing Amina recognized was the hatred that dripped off of the single word, as if Kariana had meant it as more than just a vulgar insult as to Amina's character. But there was something else there. There was a strong smell that was radiating off of her. Fear. It was pure fear that was coming out of Kariana and it tasted so.damn.good. It fueled her body, made her feel like she could do anything she wanted if she could only harness that smell, ingest it into her own body and use its power to increase her own. She wanted it. No, she needed that fear. She took a step forward, a small one, but a step nonetheless. “You don’t get to say his name!” Clenching her hands into fists, Amina ground her jaw as a low growl made its way up her throat. Sharp fingernails grew sharper and began to dig into Amina's fleshy palm. How dare she? Amina had every right to say Gavin's name aloud if she so chose. How dare she claim that Amina had no right? It had been Gavin that had caused all of this mess. He had been the one to break it off, to forgo everything they had ever dreamed of doing with their lives, he had been the one to go and get engaged to that blonde haired bitch. Bile rose in her throat as an image of the two flashed in her head but she swallowed it, along with it, choking down the growl. The wolf was ebbing its way ever closer to the edge of Amina's resolve. Soon it would find the fissure that Gavin had created and it would pull her wide open, giving itself full access to her body for the first time since it had been born. Without wolfsbane, Amina would be practically helpless to stop it, but to stop it at all would also require she was aware it was there. Her focus was so strongly on the scene in front of her, she didn't even realize that she was letting her guard down. The corner of her lip turned up ever so slightly into a smirk. The wolf was having its way with her, and Amina had no idea.

“NOW. CALL. OFF. YOUR. FUCKING. MUTT.” This time, the growl made it through her lips, an angry snarl that would have made Amina afraid of herself if she was aware she had even growled. But she was so lost within her thoughts that she didn't notice the wolf taking over her vocal chords. She didn't realize that she no longer had control of her own voice. "Don't you dare…" Amina snarled, her foot moving infinitesimally forward as she made a move towards Kariana-no, as the wolf made a move- to make her take back the disgusting comment. How dare she degrade such a proud race? Amina knew that her shift would take some time, but even with how long it would took her, Kariana wouldn't be able to run fast enough. Amina could make her pay for that comment. The wolf wanted her to. The wolf wanted her to let go and allow it to take over. It could phase faster than the girl ever could, and it could make her, make them all, pay for the way they treated her, for the way they treated its race. At the thought, Amina's nails began to bite into her palm, blood slowly beading out of the small crescent moon wounds. Her canines began to sharpen and elongate, rubbing against her gums in an almost comforting way. One bite from them and she could teach the bitch not to talk to a werewolf like that. Marcus was not a mutt. He was part of her pack. He was like a brother to her. Kariana had no right in any situation to use such a term against someone she cared so closely for. But she didn't have a chance to defend her pack member. Instead, she was caught off guard by Marcus' comments that came to follow. “What kind of man are you protecting Travers?” Her body grew rigid. What was he doing? Gavin wasn't the problem. It was Kariana who he should be attacking, insulting, making pay for what she had said. So why was he attacking Gavin? The person she loved most in life? Amina's eyes drifted slowly over to the back of Marcus' head, willing him to hear her voice in her head. Amina's voice; not the wolf's. Willing him to stop. The wolf couldn't care less who was insulted, but Amina still held some control. Gavin wasn't to be hurt in all of this. He was to stay safe. But they weren't in wolf form, he couldn't hear her right now. “That lets his whore fight his battles?” That was better. Another low growl erupted from Amina's throat but this one had a soft chuckle to it, more audible than the growl from before as her eyes turned from Marcus back to Kariana. ”I can smell you.”

A deep growl radiated from Amina's gut, a response to Marcus' comment. Because not only could he smell her, but Amina could too. And it was getting more delicious by the second. Breathing in deep, Amina surrounded herself in the scent of fear, anger, and hatred and drew it all in. Every fiber of her being was now flooded with the raw emotions hanging in the air, covering her taste buds with their sweet, sickly flavors. Then Gavin launched at Marcus, another full-fledged attack, and that let out another scent into the air. The adrenaline that was pumping through his veins added a whole different layer to her palette until it was too much that her body just couldn't contain it anymore. There was nowhere for all of the emotions, all of the raw energy she was pulling from them, to go. Except out. And that was what the wolf wanted. For the first time since it had been born, it finally found that fissure in Amina's resolve and using its claws, it gripped the edges and pushed its cage open. The wolf was free, clawing its way to the surface and pushing whatever of Amina was left out of the way. The low growl in Amina's throat grew louder and louder with each passing second as the transformation began to take place. The wolf's eyes travelled the scene, surveying the damage it could do once it was in its final transformation. When it landed on Gavin, it noticed the boys path had changed from Marcus, to itself. It braced for an attack, but one didn't come. "Amina, no." A growl was the only response the wolf provided, a warning that there was no stopping it. For once, it was going to have control and no one could take that away. For as long as the wolf could, it would keep control. But the growl hadn't seemed to be enough warning for the boy because moments later, his hands were on her shoulders. The touch sparked something within the wolf, deep down to where the girl was trapped by the wolf. She still loved the boy and the touch had roused her, but it was too late. "Amina." His pleading was futile. The wolf knew this and grinned wide, flashing long, sharp canines as the boy was pulled away from it just as the transformation finally took full effect. The wolf had managed to shut out Amina completely, leaving her adrift in her own black abyss of a mind. It was now free to play and it was going to have a damn good time.

The transformation happened in a few blinks of the eye, much faster than it had when the human was in control of the situation. Quickly shedding the bag that was slung over its torso, the wolf flung it off to the side, the belongings that had been contained, spilling over the grass since the latch hadn't been closed after the last book Amina had pulled from it. Books, ink bottles, and a small chain carrying two rings, were carelessly strewn across the grass as the wolf began to claw at itself. Within moments, shreds of clothes and skin littered the ground and where once had been Amina was now a large wolf, covered in dark black fur with a long snarling snout. Its golden eyes gleamed as it looked at the people in front of it, bracing itself to charge. First its eyes fell on Marcus, quickly recognizing the scent as friend, then they turned to the struggling boy in his arms. Don't touch him! it heard the girl protest feebly in its head. Growling low, the wolf decided to give the human this one opportunity and moved onto the next. The woman. She had been the one to start all of this, the one to insult its kind. She would die first. It took less than a second to make the decision, and once it was made, the wolf let out a snarl as it took to all fours and darted towards her, thirsting to taste the fear it had been smelling. Thirsting to taste the blood running through her veins.

Words | 2,243
Tag | Tobias, Marcus, Gavin, Kariana
Outfit | Click

[Kariana Gabrielle Travers]

Werewolves. Hadn’t she just gotten out of a brush with their kind recently enough not to put herself back into the mix? She’d seen the way they ripped the small contingent that had gone with them to shreds, watched as human bones broke into a new shape, as fur sprouted out of skin and took over. She’d likened it to an explosion of fur in her mind, replaying the imagery long after they’d left the ruined castle behind them… They were a seedy underbelly to the magical society that she couldn’t claim herself unaware of, couldn’t ignore. She’d grown up seeing them used, taught that they were beneath her no matter what some muggle legends glorified them as. They were more beast than man. She’d seen it proven, could lay claim to that fact now. Within the walls of her Grandmother’s estate she’d been able to speak to them with clipped sentences and derisive words, inside the safety of those halls their inferiority had been unquestionable- and they knew it. They knew their place when in there, but she’d unleashed her cousins temper when she heard her, been heaped with words of reprimand and censor. Reminded that outside the safety of where they were, in a different location she might be in actual trouble. She’d thought herself so superior, but then Micha always had, had always been able to afford to see herself that way. So knowledgeable because she traversed the underworld where those creatures went unchecked, because she was the one who was given the task of cementing alliances. But she’d seen her broken, seen the claw marks rent across her flesh, through the tatters of clothing she’d worn. And she’d finally understood. Because not all werewolves were just that, just as all vampires were not simply vampiric. There were those who could do magic before their change, who walked both worlds and held with them the knowledge of it. It didn’t make them any less impure, didn’t elevate them back to the status they’d once been able to lay claim to. But it did make them dangerous. Werewolves somewhat less so because of their inability to perform outside of their beast when changed, but still a threat. Not all spells could hold the creature at bay, but Kariana knew enough to know she could kill if she had to. Could do what needed to be done were she ever thrown back into the situation they’d been in when on those ancient grounds, lights streaming from wands as they fought and ran for their lives. Only this wasn’t the same situation at all. The two who stood before her hosting those inhuman yellow eyes weren’t the same as the creatures that she’d fought before, couldn’t be treated the same. She should have known before now, should have seen the signs in either of them. Marcus she may have been able to put off because of their infrequency of communication- if it could be called that. She couldn’t say she’d looked in his eyes once since she’d been warned off being seen talking to him. She’d heckled him plenty, used him to take out the ire of something marginal he’d done in front of her. But he’d never reacted like he was now, never forced her to meet his gaze. She’d avoided it in truth because he was so far beneath her… a blood traitor. Amina though… she’d looked into her eyes since coming back, seen the coloring and thought no more than what lies had been spread to cover the truth. Too blinded once more. For all that she’d prided herself on seeing things it seemed too much had slipped through her grasp… and now she was paying for it. Dearly.

And Gavin was too. She tried to ignore the way his fingers incited all new daggers of pain to shoot up her arm from the wrist she’d landed on, tried to keep the purchase she’d found there. Because he couldn’t go back after the boy. She couldn’t let him put himself into that kind of danger. He was angry with her choice of words, with the ire behind them, she knew it- had known in a way that he would be. Because he chose her. Over and over again, he’d made his point. The emotional upheaval that wanted to cause was tamped back down as she finally let her fingers fall from him, her fists clenching despite the pain. It wasn’t enough that Amina had been down here in the company of other males. Not even enough that she had been laughing while he was breaking. It wasn’t enough that she had the audacity to associate herself with social outcasts, and worse the leper that Marcus had become… but she was down here willingly with a werewolf. She had to know the other boy was one, there was no way, her being similarly afflicted, that she didn’t. She was down here with a werewolf. Knowingly. Laughing. Letting him throw her over his shoulder as if he had a right when Amina had been so clearly claimed before, already been spoken for. Never mind that Gavin had kept this from her had hidden it even. That would have to be addressed later. She figured it was the least of what would be- and there would have to be a whole slew of things. She just needed to get him out of here. That was all. She needed Amina to collect her two little heathens and take them away, as far away as possible. Far enough away for Gavin to find enough of his sanity to find purchase on. The anger and hate that had twisted her features had given way to a new light, a different emotion that just barely pulsed underneath. She needed Amina to see that Gavin couldn’t go head to head with Marcus. She needed Amina to get them the fuck gone now. To stop playing the victim and fucking stand up enough to get them away. Just to get them away. But nothing seemed to be going the way it needed to, no cosmic force shown down on them with the smallest ounce of mercy to help lead them down the right path. It was as if the lady of chaos herself had unleashed upon the rolling hill they now stood, shifting back and forth and fueling the fires that so desperately needed to be quenched. For everyone there. For everyone there, but especially for Gavin. How could he throw himself at a werewolf like that? Knowing what he knew? “What kind of man are you protecting Travers?” The voice that moved closer to her seemed to fly across her skin, breaking her eyes from the girl paces back and centering desperately on the threat advancing.

Her one hand was completely free and she found herself trying to calculate how quickly she could reach the wand tucked inside her jeans. A better man than him, an actual man- not an animal- she wanted to respond. Plenty of other insults found their way instinctively to her tongue, though she bit them all back, her eyes meeting his with her own glare. Defiance was an emotion she was more than acquainted with, racing quickly among her as she tilted her chin up at him, lips pulling into a hard line. He wasn’t worth any of this; he’d done more than just betray the blood that ran through his veins. He’d ripped the purity of himself apart and cast it aside- had completely shunned who it was he was supposed to be. And not just by letting his blood become sullied, no he’d only furthered it with his own actions. She felt the contempt slide into her belly, tasted the vileness of it on her tongue. What kind of man was she protecting? The kind that knew his place, knew where honor lay. The kind that had his faults and still managed to push past them. She was standing with the man who’d on more than one occasion shown that as selfish and arrogant as he may be, his loyalty ran deep enough to overshadow all else. How could Marcus not see? How could Amina not? Again the anger pulsed inside her head, threatening to topple it. He’d given up everything, he was doing his duty. He was keeping his word and going forward with a marriage he didn’t… and couldn’t want. He had come down here, flown down the very hill they were now standing at the bottom of, to defend the honor of a girl who for all rights and purposes shouldn’t even exist to him anymore. He was still standing here, loving the girl despite the fact that her blood was now so tainted that even the lowest of the pure bred houses wouldn’t consider allowing her into their family. If the differences could be painted any more clearly between the man she was standing in front of and the one slowly advancing on her back it would amaze her. “That lets his whore fight his battles?” Something only proven as she was pushed backwards, Gavin’s body blocking hers. Her body twisted instantly, forcing herself to face forwards as she fought the hysteric laugh in the back of her throat. It wasn’t the first time she’d been called that, was hardly the worst insult he could have thrown at her. She wasn’t Gavin’s whore and never had been, but given the choice between that and someone like Marcus’s wife? She’d be his whore any day. She may be a whore, but at least she wasn’t an animal. At least she could still claim that. Her knuckles brushed the small of Gavin’s back, rooting herself to the spot and keeping from rushing between them again. It wouldn’t do any good now, wouldn’t stop the inevitable from happening. All she could do was pray she was fast enough to grasp her wand in time to kill the mutt before he did any damage to Gavin. “I can smell you.” Again the fear fought its way up her throat, she didn’t have to ask if that was what he meant, didn’t have to wonder. She may be scared, but she was also angry- and that comment did nothing to stifle either of those things. She was scared in part of him yes, but more than anything she was scared for Gavin. Her fury overpowered all other negative emotion though, fighting to the forefront of her mind. She watched Gavin spit, watched him spring forward and went to grasp her wand, her hand raising just slightly before she watched Gavin change course… before she heard the reason behind it. She saw Gavin fall, felt the urge to move forward but she knew it would only make things worse, she was rooted to the spot he’d left her in, eyes darting between Gavin and Amina. Amina who’d just growled. Like a wolf. Like an animal.

Her heart beat in a quick tandem as she watched him move towards Amina, her fists clenching as Marcus seemed to step closer to him. He was inbetween the two of them. He was right in the midst of the biggest threats. And she was just standing there- waiting for her cue. She couldn’t kill Amina. She didn’t even think she could curse her. Not because she wasn’t angry enough to- but because she couldn’t mean it. Couldn’t mean the words that needed to flee her lips in order to accomplish that. “Don’t you dare…” Her heart beat quicker in her chest, watching as Gavin approached the steadily morphing girl. Because she knew. She knew that growl meant that something else was now residing within the petite frame of the girl she would have one day called friend. One day. She’d already begun the process of making that happen before things had been so decidedly skewed. Perhaps that’s why even when realizing the reason behind the change in her eyes she hadn’t quite grasped it. Marcus was a mutt, but in some ways she wasn’t sure if she could think of Amina as one quite yet. Something the other girl was doing her damndest to make sure she understood as she approached, growl ripping through her lips. Her fingers dipped into her waistband, fingering the familiar length of wood. The wand seemed to press against her skin, warming the flesh it lay against, calling to her. She couldn’t curse her though. She couldn’t risk it. Killing her would kill Gavin. She wasn’t even sure anymore if that was all that was stopping her, even knowing that the girl walking towards her wasn’t really a girl anymore. Adrenaline coursed through her veins, tempting her to move- begging her to make any move. Whatever move. Something. She found herself standing as still as possible. Vaguely she could hear Gavin begging in the background, as if under several layers of cloth. So similar to the voice brushing against her memory as she huddled beneath the layers of blankets she kept on her bed during winter. Only this time the tone wasn’t teasing, wasn’t light- wasn’t even speaking to her. The phantom sunlight that she felt against her eyelids faded and she realized with some amount of worry that she’d let her eyes briefly drift shut, remembering… she couldn’t remember. Not now. Couldn’t afford to. Her eyes met the yellow pair with a fierce determination, body straightening with resolve- elongating to its full potential. She wasn’t running. She could feel the fear still coursing through her, counted on it to call to the beast now stalking. More than that, more than the anger there was something else, lighting a fire beneath the very soles of her feet. She couldn’t focus on Gavin trying to stop her, not because she didn’t want to, but because Amina wasn’t. No not Amina. Because the wolf wasn’t.
She watched in abject horror as Gavin’s body was tackled to the ground- as fur sprouted the length of skin on the girl in front of her. It was done then… Everything seemed to be moving too slowly for her brain to process, barely passing as the girl hunched over- changed. She watched in fascination as it turned its gaze away from her, to the pair tussling on the grass and found her voice once more- finally. “You don’t want him, right? I’m the one you want.” She could find some small amount of pride that her voice barely shook as she moved back, taking one- two steps further from the group even as the canine face snapped back towards her. Yes. But she had to be sure, had to know that it didn’t change its course as yells could be heard from behind it. Another four steps and she found herself pausing, eyes locking with the animals’. “You broke him,” her words were low- slight, no human ear could detect the whisper that fled her lips. This time the words shook, every emotion they invoked pouring into them with a fury; anger, resentment, hate, love, hurt, betrayal. “You broke him because you were weak. Because you chose to be weak.” Because even with what she now was, even with everything that had happened had he not proved he still loved her? Had he not crawled to her even as she changed? Shown her a trust that nearly broke all of Kariana’s resolve? How could she not have fought for him? Shown up and shown that she would wait for him, shown that she still loved him? It may not have fixed everything but she knew, with a certainty she didn’t have to question, that Gavin wouldn’t be in the state he was if she had. A single tear fell down her cheek as her words seemed to do the trick, setting the wolf into motion- setting the thing leaping the short distance between them at her. Her fingers fell away from her wand as she sought frantically for something else- anything to stop her. She couldn’t stop her with magic as much as it screamed at her to do so. She could feel it humming in her bones, demanding to be utilized. She didn’t even need her wand for it, she knew it. But she was too slow, too bogged down to think of a solution.
She felt the claws rip into her first, shredding the shirt over her torso and sending her falling backwards. The pain seemed muted by the shock, burning in the back of her mind as her body made contact with the hard earth, jarred her about. Like a rag doll she fell splayed out, body bouncing slightly as the wolf came to rest over her, breath panting hot against her skin. Skin now slick with a sweat borne not only of fear and desperation but pain. A pain so deep she couldn’t even find it within herself to stop the low wail that broke up out of her throat. The one tear that had marked her cheek before was joined by others, washing her face for the first time in she didn’t even care to remember. Because suddenly the abstract pain in her chest was nothing. Was nothing compared to the teeth ripping through her side, flesh rendering useless beneath the long canines- scream working its way up and out of her throat as ribs fractured. Broken. She was broken. Her body and mind both rebelled, repelled by the feel of incisors sliding deeper into her flesh. “NO.” The single word broke past her lips mid scream, warping into it as she brought her hand up without thought, pressing her wrist as hard as possible into the furred shoulder of the thing pinning her down. She didn’t hear the hiss, didn’t register the whine that broke around her torn flesh as the feel of teeth retreating tore a whole new wave of pain through her. Burning. She was burning. If she thought that she had known pain before, if she thought she could understand the absolute mind numbing pain that tore through her she had been sorely mistaken. Scream turned to wail as the creature retreated, a different blurring of fur entering her peripheral, between her and the darker beast. Marcus… Her fingers wove into the blades of grass beneath her, tearing at the earth as she forced herself into a sitting position, ignoring the fresh waves of pain, ignoring the dots dancing on the edge of her vision. Because more than the physical pain, more than the fear that had manifested itself more prevalently into her being, more than the knowledge that she could lose her life there was something else… something greater. The bite hadn’t been located high enough to kill her, hadn’t moved close enough to her stomach to render her heart to a halt. The bite was deep, but not deep enough to end her. She was impure. She was tainted. She was better off dead. Her eyes closed on the new onslaught of tears, ignoring the wolves circling eachother and opening once more to meet a pair of all too familiar green ones across the distance.

Again a memory teased the edges of her conscious, phantom hands running over her then perfect flesh- words whispered into joined lips… Tears mingling together. She felt her eyes fog, felt the deadening taking place within them. She could never have had that, never have kept it. A sin not her own had torn that from her hands too, a mind warped that was in too close a connection with her own. The same mind had promised her that she’d always keep her on track, always point her in the direction she needed. The words had been firm, commanding- everything her mother had been. Always. A hysterical laugh broke free of her lips as her body convulsed both from pain and the torrent of her thoughts. Always. Had he known what he’d promised then? Laughter morphed to sobbing, eyes held wide open into the other pair as she did so, arms coming up to cradle her broken torso- wrapping around the flesh as if to hold it together- as if to hold her together. Always, always, always. They never meant it. Where he still loved Amina, she doubted the same would pass onto her. He’d chosen Amina. Before. He’d never chosen her. Not really. Pain split her chest into two, a howl tearing past her lips before she could stop it. “Always doesn’t last.” The words were laced with pain, rent from unsteady lips in a rasp loud enough to be heard. “Always never stays.” This time wrapped around another howl of pain that laced through her. “Always is broken. Like me,” this time whispered just loud enough as she turned away, looked at the grass to her right as if to stave off the emotion that had pulled her under. Always would never be, it was never hers. It never could be. It never would have been.





WORDCOUNT:: 3,449
MUSICPLAYING:: Bottoms Up by Nickelback
CURRENTMOOD:: Anxious
POSTTAGGEDFOR:: Gavin, Amina, Marcus, Tobias
CHARACTEROUTFIT::
AUTHORSNOTES:: n/a

TEMPLATE CREATED BY YOUR SWEET DEMISE of CAUTION 2 THE WIND

[Marcus O'Conner]

living is easy with eyes closed

- - - - misunderstanding all you see - - - - 

Her wolf was so close to the surface, calling him to join her- calling his wolf forward in a way that he didn’t even want to examine. There was too much anger here for him to keep focus, too many things beating about inside his skull as if to find a greater purchase, as if they could win and push the others back. He had to stay focused. He had to keep things from escalating. But he didn’t want to. He wanted them to escalate. Wanted to lose the control he’d fought so long and hard for, kept in spite of everything. But no, he didn’t want that. The he that was him, the he that was man wanted to maintain the status quo he’d set for himself. He wanted to keep things the way they should be. He was still grappling for the control that was so fraught with tension. It was the other side of him that wanted to let it all go, to provoke the two in front of him into making another wrong move. It wouldn’t be difficult. Both sides of him recognized that. He wanted to push them into losing control so he had a reason to himself, a reason to reach inside of himself and give all control over to the beast rattling at the proverbial bars that held him- although the rattling in his bones seemed to beg question of whether or not it was solely a mental manifestation. These two, these two that had encroached upon their time, were no more than manifestations of the world that had locked him within this cage. No more than representations of the part of society that had forced him into this role. And he wanted to reap the punishment on them as it had been on him, wanted to tear into their flesh and feast upon the fear and anger that roiled within their very blood. But he held back. He held back because he had to, because it was necessary. Wasn’t it? His wolf may be aiding his movements now, may be taking a presence in his voice he’d never allotted it before- but he was still in control. He could feel it, the tether that linked him unto himself. So long as he kept it gripped between his hands they could make it out of this without any harm coming to any of them. Of the physical sort at least. The slow brush of his mind against another had him jolting in his step, recognizing just how close to the change the both of them were. He couldn’t hear her, not yet, but he could feel her even more acutely than he had moments before- feel the pain radiating off of her. Pain. A pain he didn’t want her to feel. She was his to protect, family. The very idea that she was in pain from all of this had his hackles rising along the back of his neck, had the fingers in his bones burning as if to start the breaking process. But no, he was still in control. That was becoming a mantra to him, reminding both he and the wolf that he was. That he was the one who held their body at the moment that it was his body they were working out of. His body with two legs. His body with which harsh words and animal actions seemed so foreign…

It was the wolf that smiled in appreciation as adrenaline coursed renewed through the two bodies before him, as the cloying smell of the girls fear pressed against him, calling him ever closer. He’d never felt the urge to sink his teeth into anything so strongly before. Never felt this strong a call from the animals he’d hunted while in his four-legged form. He wanted to taste her fear, practically could with the way it fell from her in waves. Just on the tip of his tongue. He ignored the boy pressing himself back to the forefront as if his honor needed to be defended. If he focused too much on that larger form let himself look too closely into the eyes of it… he knew losing control would be inevitable. He’d talked with him, spent time with him… But the boy he’d known would never have allowed himself to be pumped full of foreign potions. The boy he’d known had left him the same as everyone else. His fists clenched as the girl flashed him a face full of righteous indignation, as if his words fueled something within her. What did she have to be righteous about? The two of them had been unnaturally close even as children, he’d been able to witness it- had commented on it once and received a backhand to the face from an all too familiar hand- one which had doled out such punishments on a regular basis. Of course, that was when everyone had assumed the two would be promised to one another. He didn’t know the circumstances which they hadn’t been, didn’t care to. But despite the fact that he was no longer within their circle, if he ever really had been, he’d heard the rumors started up about them through the castle- watched their unnatural closeness continue on. It didn’t bother him though, didn’t phase him- in part because he really wasn’t a part of them. He’d never felt at home amidst the functions they had all moved through as if it were second nature, always found the confines of his suit stifling and unnatural. He’d never felt like himself when spending time with any of them. Not the way he did with Tobias. He’d never have been able to indulge in the childish games he and Tobias took such delight in, never gotten to muse on all the strange things that filled their world with them the way he did with his friend. Where they had never seemed to entirely understand him he never had to ask Tobias to question him, never had to pause before agreeing to his plans. Even Victoria, as awkward as she could be at times, accepted him without pause- went along with his plans as if it were second nature to her, despite all of her misgivings and unconvinced protestations. Amina had become the same in such a short time. Family. They were family like family was supposed to be, not this odd convoluting of the world the two before him presented. Where they were was home. And these two were threatening that by their very presence and venomous words.

His wolf growled in answer to the one that wrung out from behind him before he could even realize it happened, eyes widening as he turned from the boy that had just started to fly at him. He hadn’t even really registered that he’d stepped out from behind Travers, that in itself was worrying because he had definitely been tracking both of their movements and he had to wonder if the wolf hadn’t taken control for just those few moments when his mind had been otherwise occupied. “Don’t you dare…” Another rumble in appreciation as watched the boy fall onto his stomach, his own fingers elongated without him realizing, bones breaking and stretching even as his nails morphed into something else entirely. But no, this wasn’t right. Wasn’t how it was supposed to go. Because that wasn’t Amina who was uttering those words, wasn’t Amina who had moved past Tobias. Tobias. Worry clouded his mind enough for his fingers to recede once more, head whipping to place the boy unharmed and just there. His gaze caught his and held long enough to gain control, to remind himself why he had to. Confidence instilled itself in him once more because he knew without a doubt that the other boy could handle him if he lost it again, if he needed to shift himself to keep him from doing something he’d never forgive himself for. But he found that with that confidence it reasserted some in himself. He couldn’t afford to need that because AMINA needed him. She needed him to stop the wolf that had already settled in a haze over her eyes, but there was a body between them, a body struggling along the length of grass to get to her and all Marcus could do was follow it. To touch him could set him off and have Amina turn on him. With the way she was rapidly shift him that would leave only two outcomes for the Slytherin. Neither of which she would forgive herself for come morning. “Amina, no.” Marcus’s steps faltered, praying that somehow the boy reached through into her. She loved him, it was certainly possible. But he was so close, so close. And Marcus knew what danger could come of being that close this close to a shift. He tensed, poised on the balls of his feet as they came into contact with one another. “Amina.” He turned his eyes to Tobias just once more, once more communicating wordlessly, flawlessly. They only had so much time.

The moment she bared her teeth he sprung, grasping at the boys shoulders and tackling him down onto the earthen floor below them, careful to keep from using too much strength and hurting him beyond what was necessary. Not that he didn’t jar him a little more than was absolutely called for in stopping him, placing his body above his and securing his flailing arms as he turned his spine stiffening as words on the wind reached his ears. What was that stupid girl doing? Panic bloomed within his chest as he fought against the now yelling boy, trying futilely to calm him with words while still listening to what was going on just beyond them. “Ye need ta stop.” The words were a prayer, begging on the lips of desperation as he turned to see the wolf following the girls taunting, his own wolf battling at the edge of his consciousness as he prayed for Amina to feel him. Not the wolf just within reach, but the boy who wanted her to stop, to run to the cover of the trees… anything. Almost as if it heard his plea it turned towards them and he found the glinting eyes running over them a small source of comfort. Good, her attention had been diverted from Travers, all he needed was to … “You don’t want him right? I’m the one you want?” He nearly howled in protest at the words that reached him, his eyes cutting from the familiar wolf to the girl slowly backing away, inviting death to her as if it were her old friend. Did she not know what she was doing? Not realize the repercussions? No, the steely set of her jaw suggested that she did, and he cursed the protective possessiveness that had driven her to this move. Her fear was so poignant now that he was afraid had he not already had his moment of clarity, already seen Tobias, he too would have given in. Her fear was so sweet, so tempting. He couldn’t help shoving harder against the body beneath him, grunting slightly as a stray knee caught in his stomach. They would both only get themselves killed. “You broke him. You broke him because you were weak. Because you chose to be weak.” The breath left his body with her words, mindless rage that wasn’t his own looming up against his brain- fogging his senses even as he saw Amina jump, claws tearing into the girl that had uttered them.
Without needing to think about it he shuddered, twisting himself and throwing the boy beneath him several feet back as he fell upon himself, falling with his knees and hands onto the earth even as it seemed to shatter beneath him. He had to stop Amina, before it was too late… His back arched even as the bones within him cracked, reforming once more into a different skeletal structure, face elongated and spurting fur. A howl rent itself from his lips as he did so, feeling Amina’s thoughts finally converge with his. Finally hearing the torment within her mind as he opened himself fully up, receiving the brunt of it with a shake of his head, leaning back from the animosity. She’d already bitten into the girl’s flesh, already torn her and he found himself mourning the loss of it all. Not for Kariana, although he wasn’t sure he wouldn’t do that later- but for the girl who was currently trapped in fur over her. ‘AMINA, Amina come on. Come back. Amina look at her. Yer KILLING HER.’ His voice was pleading as he came closer, circling the pair a good few feet away. If he approached too quickly, if he surprised her she very well could kill the girl. A low whine broke past his canine lips. He didn’t have long to try and figure a solution before the girl was lifting a jewelry clad bracelet, making him jump back in recognized pain as she pushed it into his pack mate. A growl ripped through his chest, his muscles tensing against the pain he felt through her. It was the only opening he needed though as she too sprung away from the prostrate girl. He leapt, throwing himself between them and focusing as hard as he could on the wolf before him- replaying images of earlier that day into her skull. Replaying images of carrying her on his back after the full moon back to the castle. Replaying her own memories he’d glimpsed back into her mind. Showing her the pain she’d been caused by the wolf who’d done the same to her.
Another whine built up low in his throat, his mind blocking out everything but her. But Amina, the girl trapped within her own emotions. ‘Come back ta us Birdie.’ The thought had barely passed before he saw the boy making his move, felt himself falling down on his flanks to keep from leaping the distance to him instead. Tobias would have to take care of the girl behind him, the girl whose blood was invading his every sense as it spilt uselessly onto the ground. Tobias would have to do what he could not for now, and he knew that he would.

tag Gavin, Kariana, Amina, Tobias
words 2,392
lyrics -
credit a girl with kaleidoscope eyes @ caution 2.0
wearing this

[Tobias Leberecht]

SOMETIMES I FIND IT HARD
• to believe there's someone else who could be •
JUST AS MESSED UP AS ME

It was the strangest thing, the way that his palm itched. Out of the chaos in front of him, that was what his brain wanted to focus on. The damned itching, working it's way up his arm and into his brain. His pleading words weren't going to make a difference, no matter how much he wanted them to. Only Marcus would really know just how far gone she was, but Tobias wanted to know. He craved to be in her head at this moment. So much of what was happening he didn't understand. It wasn't strange for the Slytherin's to attack them, but so highly unprovoked? So very out of place? There was something else, something that everybody else here knew but he was ignorant to. Perhaps that was the itching, his brain working so desperately in overtime attempting to pull facts out of the noises surrounding him. It wasn't until Marcus spoke again that he really started to grasp the magnitude of what was happening. He wasn't helpless, there was some things that he could help with after all. The words that were leaving Marcus' mouth, weren't his. They would never have formed in his brain. They came from somewhere else, the beast that locked eye contact with his own wasn't Marcus, but it was no less his friend. Tobias could see the wolf as clearly as if Marcus had been wearing a mask to obscure all of his other features. Unlike the intruding party, Tobias had nothing to fear there. Even the animal in the deepest part of Marcus would never hard him. Not really. Tobias' body lifted onto the balls of his feet, his hands shaking strangely, like he was getting ready to sprint in a competition. The looks that Marcus was giving Tobias, they were just a warning, but not for him. They were for Amina, Tobias, keep her calm, get her away they didn't need an actual mind link to understand. They never had.

Tobias' hand touched Amina's arm again, his cool fingers wanting to pull her away, wherever she needed to go. She didn't know it, but he could handle her in form, so long as he avoided the teeth end. Only, his fingers never even for to touch her. She was burning up, the heat radiating off of her skin in waves. Any hopes that his voice would calm her disappeared whenever Kariana spoke up. His eyes fluttered closed, like he was losing something. Whenever they opened again, Amina's face wasn't her own any longer, but that same furry mask, even though he knew she was still in human form. He, well, he wasn't sure how he felt about it. He knew it was in her, wasn't that why they had even started speaking in the first place? It was the only thing that had brought them together...but he had never seen it before. Never even for a moment hiding behind her eyes. Even whenever he had seen her at her very most vulnerable, it was all her...and she was gone. Not lost, never lost, but she wasn't here. Petitioning her would do no good. If she was losing it, Marcus might go under as well. Could nobody be the rational one here? He understood the reasoning for Marcus' provocation. Reasons that he knew he would have to assure Marcus of whenever he had his wits about him. He hadn't surrendered, he hadn't given in to the beast, he had only taken the words from it. He had needed to. Tobias could see it all, as if the events had already happened, as if it was already tomorrow and he was attempting to pick up the bits left in tonight's wake. Marcus was doing what needed to be done, because he was the only one that could do it. He was attempting to focus the anger, focus the hate on himself. To keep Amina away from whatever it was that was triggering her, it was the only way. Even if it wasn't, hadn't worked.

He wanted to help, he knew in some way that he could. He didn't want to startle Amina any further than making his own transformation whenever she wasn't in any way ready for it. She wouldn't recognize him or his smell, she wouldn't think to stop. If she even was able to at all. Only, Tobias never had a chance to make up his mind one way or the other, the boy, Gavin, was in front of her, talking to her...intimately. Just witnessing it felt like he was intruding on something, which, offended him in a strange way that he didn't want to dwell on. There was something inside of him protesting, wanting to shut out his brain before it caught up to what was happening. Were they, together? Tobias had never put any stock into rumors, he had heard everything. He always did, he was an excellent listener whenever he wanted to be. These, just had seemed far too crazy to be true. It hurt, somewhere strange inside of his belly. Everything seemed to be happening so far away from him, like he wasn't even really present, he couldn't seem to comprehend what was going on around him. Even as Marcus moved, and he felt his own body bobbing in anticipation of what was going to happen, readying himself to change in the blink of an eye, to take Amina down if he had to. Marcus had told him that he might, never said the words, but he had been told. Marcus had given orders, protect the wolf bird. Keep the moon child away from the moon. He didn't want to. Orders were orders. He was floating, underwater, or above himself. He couldn't be sure at first reflection, but he knew he wasn't present fully in his own head as Marcus ripped Gavin to the ground. Why he didn't just let Amina eat him, he wasn't certain, and wouldn't be until later. Amina took off, her ears swiveling at something she heard. Kariana, she was running too. Foolish, never tempt a wolf with a moving target. What would he have done in her place? With a formerly small girl, now large wolf barreling toward him? He liked to think he would be able to think, not just act, but he always did a lot of thinking. Perhaps more action was in order.

So very many things were happening all at once, his eyes didn't want to focus. Where did he go, what should he do? Marcus was wrestling Gavin on the ground, who still didn't seem to grasp the gravity of the situation, Amina was charging after Kariana. Neither situation he would be any immediate help in. Neither situation called for a bear, or for him. Marcus could handle Gavin, that wasn't an issue. Gavin would not be bit. His life, though bruised, would still be in tact. He wasn't needed there. Kariana, doing everything wrong, Amina, temperamental, he could help there, distract her, tackle her. His legs hopped once and took off running, his forearms growing heavy as he started to allow his body to contort somewhat grotesquely. Screaming. Reassess. Kariana, was forfeit. He could no longer help, too slow. His legs didn't stop moving as he turned directions, his eyes running over the path of objects until his eyes landed on his bag, the bag he had given to Amina in order to start their little game. Tumbling again, this time slamming his body to the ground he wrenched open the contents of the bag, fingers fishing around until they found purchase on his most beloved possession. Carefully, he opened the book, exhaling deeply onto the pages as his words started to form, if he couldn't find what he needed, Marcus would need to be able to. Marcus was just about the only person in the entire world that was allowed to read this book other than his own self. Even then, it was only in the most precarious of circumstances. The boy knew about most of the tests that Tobias was running on him, but he always seemed to function better whenever the details were excluded. He didn't like to know what, or why he was asked to do the things that he was, he just tended to do them. This whole time he had been there, in Tobias' mind. Not an actual sound, but looks, glances and body. They knew the other, they didn't need words. Which was best for times that words couldn't be used. Whenever Marcus had put himself in this, whatever was happening around the hill from where he was currently hunched in the grass, eyes straining to see more clearly in the absent light, he knew that Marcus was doing what needed to be done. As soon as Tobias had what he was looking for, he would help, he would fix what he could and reign Marcus back in. Always.

Slender fingers flipped page after page. Screaming, Kariana was screaming. Nobody should be allowed to scream like that. As gut wrenching as it was, it was order, she was mewling. Something had happened, something that he had missed. Finally finding the potion that he had been looking for he pressed into the pages, like dipping toes into the brim of a frigid lake, willing the potion to come to life, to be pulled from the pages. A red bottle was produced, with a slender neck and a rubber stopper. No bigger than what would fit into the palm of his hand. “YES!” Scooping the still open book up and under his arm, running awkwardly with the one arm pressed to his body. He could see what was happening, Kariana, on the ground, the grass all around her red, the dirt turning into a disgusting mud under the red grass. Her body, contorting upon itself, having to cling to keep herself together. She needed to stop moving. Marcus, keeping Amina at bay, Amina...no, focus, he couldn't see what she was doing. He knew that she would need his help in the morning, but if he didn't help Kariana now, she wouldn't make it. Her movements was just making things worse. All he knew, was that she wasn't near. Blind faith put Tobias' body between Marcus' lurking, fur covered fur and fresh meat so easily consumed. Blind faith knew he had nothing to fear, no need to keep an eye over his shoulder. Tobias' teeth wrenched the rubber stopper from the bottle, his grip in danger of breaking the thin glass if he didn't hurry. On his knees, he scooted around her body and lifted her head until it was resting on his thigh, just off to the side of his body, his legs coming up and prying her arms from her body. So much blood. Organs peeking just out.

 “Always doesn’t last.” He couldn't pretend to know what she was thinking, who knew where the mind went whenever it was delirious with pain. “Always never stays.” Every sound she made forced him to wince. Whoever she was seeing, whatever she was dwelling on, it certainly wasn't him. She couldn't see him. Perhaps it was better that way, perhaps so long as she was seeing something comforting she would allow him to help her. “Always is broken. Like me,” “Focus” he muttered, could she even hear him, hear anything? He had never imagined being this close to a dying person would be so intimate.”See whoever helps you.” he said, mostly to himself as he went about his work. He hoped that she saw who she loved, who she wanted. Maybe this would make things easier for her. He had no idea what this was like, but he had certainly heard enough about it to imagine. His free hand gripped her wrist, the one still in one solid piece until the darkly purple skin of her other one. He had no idea what this potion was going to do, if it was going to hurt, only that he knew it would work. He didn't know how, but he knew that it would work. Perhaps not quickly, but late was better than never he hoped. Quickly, he poured the potion out all over the open wound, where it instantly started to bubble as it hit her skin. He could hear the fading whimpers of Marcus' mask and he knew, he knew that Kariana was gone. That she was converted. A sick part of him was a little excited, he had never seen anybody turned before, and she was turning in his very arms. The potion would just keep her clean, and he hoped, prayed, to ease her transition just a little. Maybe even make her recovery time just a little bit shorter. If nothing else, it would stop the bleeding. He had derived the potion from herbs and Marcus' blood, he knew it would help heal. Since she was already gone, his blood couldn't do any further damage to her. Nothing could stop the transformation. Inhaling deeply “I'm sorry.” he muttered, though she couldn't hear him, and grabbed her injured wrist, needing to hold her down, to hold her still. He was stronger than her for tonight, after that, who knew. He could do what he could. All of his focus was on the girl in his arms. Such a strange image, he never even imagined that he would be in a position like this.

“Marcus” he muttered, never taking his eyes off the girl. The boy would hear him, he always did. “Marcus, hear my voice.” he knew the boy needed help. He was remaining still, but at what cost, what hurt his 'pack' hurt him, all emotions were common, shared. If he understood right. Amina was exploding, he could hear it in the sounds coming from off in the distance. Whatever Gavin was doing was working, somehow, but it couldn't be easy to hear, and Marcus, in that form, could see everything, hear it all. Kariana was still muttering, her words softer now, he didn't know what she was saying, but her hand moved to interlace with his, not his. Some ghost who only her eyes could see. He didn't dare move her any more, not until the potion had worked and her bleeding had stopped, at the least. “Marcus come back to me. She needs help. You can help her.” talk her through it Marcus, don't do this to yourself, don't listen in. It's not your fault, you did the best you could. Amina is her own person. All of the words that he wanted to say, but couldn't. He just hoped that Marcus could read in between the gaps in his voice. "Marcus.” he breathed, using everything in his strange mind to keep his voice level while he used everything in his body to hold Kariana as still as possible. “Turn around Marcus, she has to do this on her own.” His eyes lifted from Kariana, slowly. Locking on the back of the furry head, he would stare him down until he did. It wasn't until the golden eyes turned around that he could exhale.

TAGGED ! amina, marcus, kariana, gavin
WORDS ! 2,527
OUTFIT ! CLICK
LYRICS ! sometimes by skillet
TEMPLATE ! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ! -hello